The Beau Zone

Toys In The Attic: The Aspirations And Regrets Of A Media Fan And Personality

2011-06-06T01:44:00.000-07:00

I don't have a broadcasting degree.

I sort-of took a broadcasting course, the old NIB one, and at night, too (you can roll your eyes now, people), but got so disgusted with the place I never came back after the last official class and never officially graduated.

And the first part of that course was actually during the last few months of Hard Rock Heroes in 1993.

So, on occasion, I find myself wondering for a second of any possible regrets I might have about not taking a full-time broadcasting/journalism course - a real one - at the time most people take such courses, which is in the years directly after high school.

And the answer is always the same - no.

How could I? The world was different back then.

I was a teenager in the '70s. I graduated high school in 1980. On my show Hard Rock Heroes, I was like a Muchmusic VJ. In the '70s and early '80s, there were no such things as music video channels. There weren't even any specialty channels, as they're called in Canada, yet. (I prefer David Letterman's label "cable deal.") Winnipeg/Canadian TV was represented by three channels - affiliates of CBC and CTV and independent CKND - and "cable" was affiliates from North Dakota of U.S. networks CBS, NBC, and ABC. And that's it.

People on TV were very stuffy and intellectual older men in suits like Ray Torgrud, save for the occasional attractive weather girl. Men I couldn't relate to. Men whose words that came out of their mouths still mostly went over my head (Torgrud again), even after two years of Mr. Keddie lectures from his Glenlawn Collegiate history classes.

You would be hard-pressed to find anyone even wearing a pair of jeans of television back then, never mind anyone talking about Cheap Trick, Aerosmith, The Hangover (both the movie and real ones) McDonald's Big Macs, or anything that comes out of the mouths of anyone, including hosts, of today's daytime talk shows and reality shows. Even look at just the studio audience of the more women's-oriented shows today like the Marilyn Dennis show or The Talk and compare it with '70s versions of shows like that. The '70s version had an audience that looked like war-torn babas from the Ukraine who had never heard of facial expressions. Marilyn's studio audience is all rocked-up gals in jeans, who no doubt partied until 5:00 a.m. when they were teens in the '80s at alcohol-fueled house parties laced with Van Halen played louder than God when someone's parents were away.

There certainly weren't any entertainment reporters back then, either. And that's about the only thing I would be cut out for in broadcasting. (I'm going to leave radio out of this essay, because I'd kind of be digressing if I discussed radio due to my long-time opinions about rock radio and all the great music they don't play that intertwines with this subject.)

Not only that, but even today, I would be over my head when it came to news reporting. I'm not the sharpest knife in the drawer when it comes to the goings-on of the federal, provincial, and civic governments, or the American government. Certainly not the economy. I understand the most basic things, and I know how the parliamentary system works, and how a party's seats won translates to who governs and what majority and minority governments are all about. But a lot of the contents of, say, Tom Brodbeck's Winnipeg Sun column, or the things Marty Gold used to rant about on The Great Canadian Talk Show (and still does on his blog) that involve the inner workings of government and the police are things I just don't have the mental resources to ever come up with, or even comment on, myself.

So there was absolutely nothing that existed in the '70s and early '80s that would have made me aspire to being any kind of on-air personality.

The course I took did do one thing to me, however. Throughout the course, the instructor (if I can use that term) used the word "broadcaster" a lot. Well, yeah, because we're supposed to be there to learn how to be broadcasters. But I didn't get that at first. That's why I started off the eighth paragraph above by saying "people on TV," 'cause I'm trying to paint a picture of me in the '70s there. See, with Hard Rock Heroes, I wanted to promote myself from being just an ordinary concert audience member. It frustrated me that I couldn't go hang out backstage and hobnob with all the celebrities and media types back there. The routine of buy a ticket, watch the show from your seat, maybe buy food and hang out in the concession area checking out girls, socialize with your friends, and leaving the show afterward had started to get old to me. Doesn't matter if I went with friends or by myself. So I thought that, of all us audience members, if I had a forum for it, I could be the guy who COULD go backstage to talk to the band, as long as I had a microphone in my hand and a cameraperson to record it. Then I could air it in my forum, which, as it turned out, manifested itself in the form of being my own TV show called Hard Rock Heroes. I became the guy from that show. But.....a broadcaster? That word never entered my mind. I never thought of the VJs on Muchmusic as broadcasters, either. They were like me: Hot dudes and babes on TV, wearing jeans and talking about music, and awkwardly finding ways around using rock fans' favorite swear words. I spent the Hard Rock Heroes years so wanting to be a Much VJ - sending in tapes, having an in-person interview with Much's Nancy Oliver. My idea of a "broadcaster" was still someone like Lloyd Robertson. Then later, I became interested in the power of television, and tried to use my power, if I had any, to promote local bands.

But, fast forward to the present, and I have become more comfortable with the word "broadcaster." It's grown on me. I'm pushing 50 now, and, while I'm not your parents' 50, I'm way too old to be on Much now. But that's okay. Because, as I illustrated in the paragraph above where I talk about things like Marilyn Dennis' audience, the world has changed. '70s and '80s teens have grown up, but in a different fashion. They've taken their rock albums with them. The MTV/Much casual/rock music attitudes in which now everyone is an overgrown teenager, college degree in something or not, have swept North America. News departments at TV stations have entertainment departments and reporters and segments, and, beginning with Entertainment Tonight in 1981, there are now a slew of TV shows dedicated solely to entertainment reporting. And I love all of them. And I want to be on all of them. I'd love to be a Winnipeg ETalk correspondent for CTV, if there was such a thing. I'm a complete couch potato for those shows, but with the eyes of someone paying attention to who the reporters are and how they do their jobs and everything revolving around "if I was in their shoes in being given this assignment" when I'm watching one of their reports.

So, yeah, I would feel like, if the job was the right one that I could perform, like an entertainment-oriented one, that I would certainly feel comfortable performing it, and calling myself a "broadcaster." If I were in jeans or a suit. And hopefully it's an awards-show type of suit, not the one Lloyd's wearing.

Now the flip side: What I WAS doing in the years after high school.

I actually cover this pretty well in my biography on my Hard Rock Heroes website. In a nutshell: Throughout grades 1 to 12, I pretty much had the same curfew. I did "break through" to see my first rock concerts - Alice Cooper, then Aerosmith/AC/DC - in 1978, but I basically had a sheltered life due to a parent who didn't know how to parent. Good thing I had friends to teach me about life back then. Then I got so busy with homework in grade 12 (all 300 courses) I just did homework all night, every night. I didn't even watch TV. I might spend 1.5 hours figuring out one math problem. Then, through a friend at school, I got a job at McDonald's on St. Anne's Road. The crowd there was totally different than my high school. My classmates were like the guys on The Big Bang Theory. My McDonald's co-workers were all rock and roll partiers and Judas Priest/AC/DC fans. All denim and leather. So were the girls, and they looked like Playboy centerfolds, too. (Too bad it was still the era of jeans, white socks, and white runners for girls, and not today's minidresses and black high heels, but I digress.) The people were different because my classmates were from St. Vital, and my McDonald's co-workers were mostly from Windsor Park and Southdale, the suburbs across the Seine River that I still today refer to as "the party capitals of Winnipeg." So began a good three years of what most people experience during their high school years but I experienced AFTER those years, the ROCK AND ROLL PARTYING YEARS. And there were a lot of parties during those years, including in the McDonald's crew room. In fact, those years and the Hard Rock Heroes years are tied in my mind as being the best years of my life.

So it's kind of hard to regret not going to college - well, actually I did try twice, with other courses, but quit both times, and again, more details are in the "Beau's Biography" section of the Hard Rock Heroes website - when that would have taken the place of the best partying years of my life.

I should acknowledge somewhere in here that, while MTV started in 1981, it didn't seem real as a career aspiration because 1) it was new, and 2) it was American. The odds are too overwhelming against coming up with the idea to do something like Hard Rock Heroes and doing that for three years to use it to springboard to being a VJ on an American music video network. No way in hell can a Canadian with what would still be seen as too-little experience become an MTV VJ. I don't think MTV can convince the U.S. government that they can't find, among 250 million U.S. citizens, someone to be a VJ, causing them to have to hire a Canadian like me. That's the way it works in getting a U.S. job, unless a particular field has shortages, like nursing. Plus we couldn't really see MTV on our Canadian TV screens. Red River College showed MTV in their lounge in 1981 via satellite, and fortunately, I had a friend then who attended that college, so I would drop him off and pick him up all the time, giving myself an hour either before or after to watch MTV in the lounge. So I did see original MTV VJs Nina Blackwood and Mark Goodman. Muchmusic started in 1984, but as Winnipeggers like me residing on the west side of the Red River (I moved from St. Vital to Osborne Village in 1984) that had cable company Videon back then know, Videon could not provide us with Much or TSN until September 1987. In fact, a popular hangout in the '80s for my crowd was the bar at the Marion Hotel, on the east side of the Red River, first because they presented on their huge TV screens in 1981 this new invention called rock videos, then later because they had either Much or TSN on their screens, even though it was just the pictures only due to the DJ music in the bar. I first saw Much VJ Erica Ehm do her thing on the Marion screens, and I remember when we were in the bar early one night, before the DJ started, and we could hear the TV sound, and I was fascinated watching her and hearing the sound of her voice for the first time. When we finally got Much in September 1987, I remember watching her in my living room and being thrilled that I could finally hear what she was saying on a regular basis.

The point being that music video channels, although they started in the '80s, remained on the peripherals of our lives for most of the decade, not really ingraining themselves into our lives, or my life, until the last years of the decade. With the exception of the frustration of reading about the goings-on on MTV in U.S. rock magazines, especially the Headbangers Ball, and not being able to see any of it. (Hey, there's something I should look for on You Tube.)

So here I sit, a former cable access Muchmusic-style-oriented TV show host, having bombarded the appropriate people in my city of Winnipeg with the appropriate materials - and yes, over the years I have done that - in hopes of parlaying my unique broadcasting experience into some kind of full-time paying gig, and receiving little real interest. Well, at least they know me. Both from that and, by now, all my internet stuff.

I am a fan of Red River's CreComm, though. Saw their pamphlets in the early '80s, thought they were too intellectual for me back then or that the course was more for the print journalism or advertising industries, or to teach people how to be Ray Torgrud. Basically, in some form, those may have been a combination of truths and excuses and that I wasn't ready. Now, it seems closer to what I'm interested in, maybe partly because I've grown and matured as a person and can relate to the material more. It's also fun now, with the internet, perusing the blogs online of both the students and instructors and following what avenues students have gone on to. Which students? The ones I saw at one of their yearly Independent Professional Project (IPP) presentations that are open to the public, this one held at the Park Theatre. And heck, the way the world seems to be today, you can't just be a fan of media anymore - if you are, everyone tells you you should be in media, and/or in this course. I'd love to take the course. But I have to work to make a living. I can't work and take a full-time course at the same time. And if I were to take CreComm, I would not want to work anywhere, even part time. I would want to devote my entire life to that course and to the media.

But the elephant in the room for me is - well, besides the fact that Red River College might not accept a 49-year old (this July) man into CreComm - that I don't know whether a course like CreComm, or the Academy Of Broadcasting course, will do any good for me. Maybe TV stations in Winnipeg just "don't want that Hard Rock Heroes guy" regardless of whether I have official broadcasting credentials or not. Maybe I've pigeonholed myself with my Hard Rock Heroes persona. If so, then taking those courses are just a waste of time. All I can do is speculate, because when there's no interest, you don't get anything in the mail as a response. Well, I did get a couple of responses from news directors, but they were short and didn't say much about what they thought about my personal broadcasting experience.

If I won the lottery, then I could quit my job and take CreComm, even if it were just to entertain myself. I'm sure I would just love it. Maybe make some new friends. But that will never happen, because I don't buy lottery tickets.

And that again brings me to: Do I have any regrets over how things have turned out up to this point? And I have to mull it over, think of all the things you have just read, and conclude yet again: "No."

Was I born too soon? Maybe, but I loved growing up when I grew up, so I wouldn't change that, either. The Archies, The Partridge Family, The Brady Bunch when I was 7 to 10 years old. Kiss, Happy Days, Welcome Back Kotter, Aerosmith, disco, north Portage Avenue record stores when I was a tween, then a teen. No, man, I wouldn't change a thing.

My being ahead of my time is just the way it turned out.

And life isn't over yet.

Dire Straits' "Money For Nothing" and Bullying

2011-02-28T01:48:00.000-08:00

Here are my thoughts on this whole Dire Straits "Money For Nothing" fiasco, where the Canadian Broadcast Standards Council ruled that the 1985 song should now be censored, with the offending word "faggot" removed from the song.

And, as usual, my opinions are completely different from anyone else's, and don't reflect anything I've read anywhere so far.

While I can totally understand the arguments against censorship or editing of this song, I don't mind if it's edited to take the word "faggot" out. (And I'm not gay.) Actually, I'd rather hear that word or the "N" word bleeped out of songs than the various sexual representations of coarse language like "fuck" or "cock."

You see, there is an element out there that think that that song is actually celebrating the attitudes of the two retail appliance workers Mark Knopfler overheard and immortalized in song.

I personally refer to that element in society as the "macho redneck caveman bullies (MRCB)."

These are the guys who were bullies when they were 10 years old in 1972, and probably still are today. It's great that people are trying to do things about bullying in schools now, but what about the 10-year old 1972 bullies who are 40-something-year-old truck drivers and factory workers now? Do people think they're too far gone for help? That they can't deal with the potential verbal and physical violence from these MRCB if they tried to somehow corral their redneck behaviour and attitudes?

When I read in the papers of today's bullies and what kind of things they bully people about, NONE of it matches what the MRCB of the '70s cared about and bullied people over.

Basically, these guys want all males around their age to be exactly like them. You must be a sports fan, - preferably listing hockey fights as your favorite "sport" - you must drink beer very, very fast, you must work in the warehouse and DESPISE all so called "office people" when they are not standing there, you must wear a baseball cap and have a mustache, and you must judge music artists by how hard it is to play the guitars in their songs, which is why the favorite band of MRCB is Rush. (Wonder what the MRCB think of Maroon 5 or hip-hop music, or anything on Muchmusic's New.Music.Live.) The MRCB figure that if anyone can learn to play the instruments in a given song, then what good is the band that plays that song? Then you try to get the MRCBs to explain guitar playing, to explain what the difference between Rush and Kiss guitar playing is, and why and how Rush playing is more intricate, and instead of an intelligent answer, the MRCBs just become more and more upset, start yelling and screaming, and don't answer your question. I had to wait 20 years to read the answer in a guitar magazine, and it was actually so intellectual of an answer that I couldn't totally understand it myself, since I'm not a guitar player.

If you don't fit in with all of the above atributes, like for example, if it takes you an hour to drink a beer like I used to be (I can drink one in half an hour now), then you are branded a "faggot" by the MRCB and you are bullied. Period. I think of the song "If You Don't Start Drinking, I'm Gonna Leave" by George Thorogood. That's the only song that comes close to acknowledging the existance of MRCBs, and, wouldn't you know it, it's a song that supports them. Except around here, it should be called, "If You Don't Start Drinking, YOU'RE Gonna Leave." That's more what I'm accustomed to. If you and the MRCB are 10 years old in 1972, you are bullied on the schoolyard at recess, until a teacher shows up. Then the bully changes his attitude and the teacher wonders what the problem is. If you and the MRCB are 45 years old in 2007, you are bullied in the workplace, until an "office person" shows up. Then the bully changes his attitude and the "office person" wonders what the problem is. Oh, and the bully is the warehouse manager, too. And his boss, the CEO is a bully, too, but I don't want to digress here. Let's get back to the Dire Straits song.

The argument of the MRCB is that Mark Knopfler and Dire Straits know what "good music" is (which is basically anything played on CITI FM) and so, the appliance workers Knopfler overheard inspired him to write "Money For Nothing" to point out, through quoting those workers, how awful and terrible artists like Michael Jackson and Prince are, which includes calling them faggots. Doesn't matter that the MRCB are completely and totally off the mark. They'll just say to anyone reading this who will try to tell them that Knopfler wrote that song to expose how ignorant those workers are, "How do you know? Do you know Dire Straits personally?" The MRCB don't know them personally, either, of course, but you can't convince them that what they look upon as normal behaviour by people who they think are "their own kind" is anything but. Oh, and don't think I've neglected an artist's look, either: in order for an artist to gain the respect of the MRCB, they must look like the way Boston or Foreigner look on the covers of their first albums. They can't wear anything or have hairstyles that would cause the MRCB to NOT WANT TO BE SEEN WITH THEM IN PUBLIC, i.e., anything that would brand them as "faggots." (1970s FM radio fans beating up AM radio fans could be another image the mind conjures up here.)

And, because there are so many MRCBs still out there, that's why this issue involving this song from 1985 has hit a nerve with the Canadian public. (The issue would be more intense only if the song were from 1975 or 1978 rather than 1985.)

Do something about bullies in high school today, those hip-hop-or-weird-band-loving gang members? Sure, why not? Everyone supports that. But try to take one small step against the MRCBs that have never been attacked before - "hey, that's US!" and all hell breaks loose.

The MRCBs have it coming, and have had it coming for 40 years now. I don't like being called a faggot, even though I'm not gay.

So if the CBSC wants that word censored, they'll get no argument from me. If it isn't censored, well, hopefully what the press writes about the real reasons Knopfler wrote the song are correct, and so that's fine with me, too. Either way, hopefully this will finally open up discussion on finally doing something about bullying from the MRCBs.

Now if we can only get the uncensored version of "Patron Tequila" by The Paradiso Girls played on Hot 103, heh, heh.....

The Evolution of Winnipeg's Bar Circuit From the Late '70s to Today

2010-10-09T15:46:00.000-07:00

I had a phone conversation recently with a friend of mine who's in a cover band. The conversation went typically. We've covered this ground before. He just doesn't understand how the music business in Winnipeg has changed since the late '70s/early '80s in the area of bars and clubs and what they offer for live music nowadays, and how it got to this point. He still thinks the bands in this city of note that are waiting to be discovered by record companies are the cover bands that play at places like Mirrors, The Palomino Club, and Silverado's. He is clueless of the bands that play at the Pyramid, the Albert, or The Zoo. The bands that exhibit today's current "DIY" (Do-It-Yourself") approach. He just dismisses that scene as "alternative music that appeals to very few people." He can't figure out why the days don't exist anymore when a cover band that plays a few of their own originals can go into a bar for a week, and, like the band Click, "pack the place on a Tuesday night." Well, lack of money due to the economy, more things to spend money on nowadays, like computers and DVDs, and more need for a college education that requires homework and more sleep the night before instead of going to bars would be reasons for a starter. I don't know if this guy lives under a rock during the day when he's not performing or what, but I can't figure out how he can know nothing about his current music business surroundings. He's single. Does he simply not exist when he's not on stage? Does he just sit there and stare at blank walls all day? Doesn't he read the papers, Uptown, or watch TV? Doesn't he check out the bar listings? Doesn't he TALK to people?

Anyway, here's an e-mail I sent him after our conversation that covers a few more things. I thought that after writing all this, I would like to do something more about it. So I put it here on The Beau Zone. It's slightly edited. The subject matter of how the bar circuit has changed from, say, 1978 to now is actually quite fascinating, and it's something you never read about in Winnipeg media. You always read about Burton Cummings' and Randy Bachman's era in the '60s, but what about after that? What about the '70s, the '80s, and the '90s? It's a subject that never gets discussed. And I can't even fully discuss it. I've never worked for the booking agencies or the bars involved. Maybe I'll alert Winnipeg club writers about this blog, and they can be inspired to write about this subject. That would be great. So here's the e-mail I sent my friend. Hope you enjoy it.

"Another slant on what we were talking about on the phone:

"What started as the DIY approach for all-original bands has evolved into the next level, and I think initially the dividing lines between music genres is what allowed DIY to grow, but nowadays, with generation changes, it pretty much applies to all genres. Especially when party rock or straight ahead rock isn't being done anymore except by country bands or rare bands like Nickelback that are evolving from their former status as being post-grunge bands.

"Winnipeg's best-known hard rock bands are Dreadnaut and Xplicit. What someone like Dreadnaut does, is that, since it is an all-original band, and when they were in their infancy they were probably the first or second band on a night of unknown bands maybe once a month or something, is that they take their now-headlining gigs and make something special out of them. Independent bands all have their own CDs out that they sell at their merch table with t-shirts, as well as Music Trader and Into The Music, and online via CD Baby using Paypal. They put up MySpace pages with their music that fans can hear for free on their computers but not download. They poster their gig everywhere, and it becomes an event, because it's just one date. Today's fans of metal, punk, folk, or singer-songwriters, who seek out gigs they're interested in at venues (they're more called venues now, not even bars) would probably think of the old "bar circuit" of the late '70s as something very odd, and perhaps boring, too. They might wonder, 'What kind of excitement does an artist offer when they're playing every day, all week, three sets a night, at a bar, then all over again next week at a different bar, and with 70% covers, 30% originals?' These people, like the band members, probably have day jobs that are DIY, too, like running their own businesses, maybe using the internet, or if they are employees, then it's something seasonal, so that they can easily procure time to tour (because a lot of these artists tour to other cities, too). Personally, having lived as a fan with both systems, I find neither one better than the other. They're just different, that's all. I will say that the old '70s bar circuit is more geared towards the 'employee' mentality; If you're an employee at a factory or something, then you've got plenty of opportunities to see someone. Similarly, a band member feels like an employee himself, doing nightly music shifts and perhaps making a living at doing covers.

"That bar circuit scene was kind of over by the early '80s, although it sort of wasn't, because the notable strong exceptions were Night Moves & The Diamond Club, along with Norma Jeans. This era produced Jenerator, The Shivers, Playground X, Howling Now, etc., who all did originals. However, the independent music scene had started and was alive and well with Monuments Galore, etc., and grew from there. There had always been a distrust towards CITI FM, too, as CITI wanted to be the self-appointed gatekeepers of what was good rock/hard rock and what wasn't. Either you were frustrated at the bands and albums they didn't play, or you were sheep who dismissed those bands and albums as not being any good "because CITI doesn't play them."

"'70s rock had morphed into '80s hair-band rock. Then the bottom fell out entirely around '93 when grunge and alternative took hold and Night Moves/Diamond Club became country music clubs. (People say grunge and alternative started earlier, like around '91, but things took longer to catch on in Canada, and record companies here were still signing regular rock bands like Big House and Dead Beat Honeymooners, which certainly fueled my TV show Hard Rock Heroes.) CITI FM ultimately couldn't deal with this and went classic rock. So-called 'regular hard rock' was dead and all forms of music that were left went DIY. Then came computers, Windows, Microsoft Word, and the internet, which took DIY to a whole new level. Meanwhile, in the late '90s, pop came back, and in a very, very SEXY, and female, way. Rap and hip-hop had been brewing slowly since the '80s, really. The dance clubs became a zenith. That's where we are today, with envelope-pushing girl pop, rap and hip-hop dominating the charts, along with the occasional rock band thrown in here and there for contrast. All songs are full of swearing now, and have to have the offending words and phrases removed for radio and video. And don't forget all those artists that came from American Idol! In this environment, for whatever does remain for a 'bar circuit,' which probably only still exists due to MLCC regulations concerning cabarets, is now strictly a 'cover band bar circuit' (you tell ME when/if bar owners and/or the agencies told you 'no originals at all') in which the songs a cover band plays must be hits that complement the DJ in the places that have cover bands and that keep people dancing. Nostalgia for old hits has helped today's cover bands, too.

"I said on the phone that if a band could sneak in an original that fits in with what you just read there would be no market for it. I'm going to go back on that a bit. It's just something that has been untapped here in Winnipeg. Pop music out of Winnipeg? (And that's basically what it would be - Pop music.) Not much of a precedent there. The Shivers were pop-rock and they made a decent headway, but that band existed when we were still in the Diamond Club/Night Moves/Norma Jeans era, and they imploded when Randy Reibling, who arguably WAS The Shivers, left. (I'm talking about the original Shivers from the early '90s, not the cover-band version with Randy and a bunch of guys from later in the decade - by then, FOR SURE Randy himself was The Shivers.) I was reading about Enjoy Your Pumas, a name I've seen gigging around town, this weekend in Stylus, and they are apparently a pop-dance act. And I had forgotten to talk about Ash Koley! I LOVE Ash Koley. She's a Winnipeg pop artist who just moved to Toronto not so long ago. Her music is like '80s new wave meets Abba meets Disney. Very catchy, and Hot 103 has played it. One of her current songs is now a Manitoba Lotteries commercial! Check out her music and You Tube embedded videos at http://www.myspace.com/ashkoley.

"This doesn't fit anywhere in this, but I feel it's worth mentioning: The rise of DJ culture. DJs like to feel that their scratching and mixing and mashups are an art form now so this gives to the rise of DJs as artists. Look at the listings for the Pyramid, the Albert, and the Academy, and you'll see they are half DJ nights now. Even The Zoo is trying DJs on occasional nights. And certainly Ozzy's has had great success with the Ready Mix DJs on Thursday nights ever since The Collective/Die Maschine closed and became American Apparel/Hifi Club.

"Certainly, the changes have been jarring for any musician used to making a living weekly in the bars, who might have gotten into it originally in order to make original music, but who got lured in, as they got older, by the easy lifestyle playing covers brings when compared to the uncertain DIY ethic, particularly if you like to play a style of music that DIY doesn't jibe with, although in 2010, that may have changed, too. If you can find some way to pay the bills, would you consider doing a CD of original music with a band and looking for DIY gigs to promote it? Actually, at The Zoo, I don't know what it used to be, but now it's partially a pay-to-play deal: You pay The Zoo $500.00, and the night is yours. You charge whatever you want for cover and you keep 100% of it. The Zoo keeps 100% of beverage sales. Any money made or lost is yours. You are responsible for your own publicity (postering, advertising, etc.). Full pay-to-play, like in L.A., means if only 10 people show up, no one's buying drinks and the bar somehow charges you a hefty sum and you never get to play there again. I don't know how that compares with The Zoo's situation. That's where you get L.A. band members passing out flyers on the Strip themselves, pleading people walking down the street to go to their gig. More info on what The Zoo does at http://www.myspace.com/osbornevillageinnofficial.

"Marc Labossiere's situation is puzzling. I believe he plays all '90s rock covers by bands like 3 Doors Down nowadays, and somehow he's allowed to do that. I haven't seen him in a long time, but when I did, the dance floor didn't clear for him. I don't believe he does his originals from his CDs. He probably could. He probably did the best job anyone on the bar circuit could who WASN'T willing to get off of it and go tour in other cities for peanuts without radio or video play. In other words, he became a big WINNIPEG star with his CDs, but never wanted to go to the next level. Ya gotta get off that bar circuit, Marc, dude! It takes money to make money. Maybe bands like Kick Axe got lucky with offers and Marc didn't. I have no idea. But then, Kick Axe was still years earlier than the club environments Marc has played in. I just thought I should say something special about him.

"And that's all I have for you now. I'll probably save this writeup and change around a few words and use it for The Beau Zone."

And, as you have now read, that's exactly what I have done!

Your thoughts, people?

Getting "Shit"-Faced On MTV Canada And Muchmusic

2010-07-25T22:57:00.000-07:00

I love it when you get that feeling of accomplishment, especially when it's unexpected. All I did was write an e-mail.

I have noticed the last few months, on MTV Canada, they can say the word "shit" now, just like on Muchmusic. Well, I should hope so, now that both channels are now owned by the same company, CTV. Actually, I thought the reverse would happen, that after CTV's takeover of CHUM (where they had to divest themselves of CITY-TV, now owned by Rogers), CTV would can Muchmusic personalities from saying "shit." But no, CTV is continuing to let that word go and has now extended the practice to their MTV channel that CTV had started prior to the CHUM takeover.

Could that be as a result of my self-explanatory e-mail to MTV Canada's feedback address this past January?

That e-mail, through the magic of copy and paste, goes like this:

"Regarding your 'Top Ten Holy Shit Moments' show you aired at Christmas: Isn't it ironic that, while on another show similiar to this one you also aired around Christmas, you appear to be taking a potshot at Muchmusic and the kind of young audience they cater to nowadays, on the Top Ten Holy Shit Moments show on MTV, every time you actually say the word 'shit,' it's bleeped out, while Muchmusic has been letting that word air for years and years now. I recall a Much On Demand where Leah Miller appeared to be deliberately saying it all through the hour, so I was wondering if she had just found out that day that Much lets it air unbleeped. But that practice must go back, gosh, about 10 years by now.

"And, to add further irony, Much and MTV are both owned by CTV now. Do the CTV honchos know that 'shit' airs on Much, the target audience channel of ages 10-25, but is bleeped on MTV, the target audience channel of college age and higher?

"Maybe the Much people don't want to bring that up to their new CTV bosses, because that could be the way they find that out, and then they'll can that practice. Personally, I hope it goes the other way and you get to say 'shit' unbleeped. I would love it if you could find a way to air all your shows that air, say, late at night, completely language uncensored. Only bleep stuff during the day. I realize why that can't happen, though."

I hit "send" and.....voila! There's Daryn Jones & Nicole saying "shit" on MTV Live. Not bad.

This, of course, represents another baby-step in the repositioning of all cuss words to just being slang words. Another one is the movies CTV airs overnight on weekends that are completely uncensored, too, if they can get an uncensored cut. The envelope is getting pushed, baby.

And, as a dude with the rock and roll attitude that used to host a hard rock TV show, the fact that I could be held a little bit partially responsible for this evolution is, well, yeah, something to be proud of. Something to be FUCKING proud of, dude! YEAH!

(And, hey, that also means Much and MTV Canada can say the entire title of William Shatner's new sitcom "Shit My Dad Says" on air! The subject of this blog post coupled with this sitcom's title could add another baby-step to all this, too, as the days march on.)

My thoughts on "The Runaways"

2010-05-17T00:06:00.000-07:00

Okay, I guess it's time. My first regular Blogspot post! I'm so excited.....

My favorite movie review site is Pajiba. As a fan of the band The Runaways, I thought I'd copy and paste here my thoughts on the recent Runaways movie that I wrote in the comments section of their review page on the film (Note: It starts out with me responding to an ill-informed fan named Protoguy who claimed both the Lita Ford and Jackie Fox characters weren't in the film):

"As a huge Runaways fan, Protoguy: Lita Ford IS in the film. Bassist Jackie Fox is not, probably because she was the one causing legal trouble and she's now a lawyer herself, so the producers probably thought she would be the only real threat here, so they created a fictional bassist with no lines to replace her. Brian: Once the group was solidified with the lineup that appeared on their albums, there were really only two bass players: Jackie Fox on the first two albums and Vickie Blue on the second two albums. Cherie Currie left the band after the second album, at the same time Jackie Fox did. Which brings me to my thoughts on this film: Most of the film is really good, but the last bit sucks. As you noted, Cherie's biography is the source material. But her bio is not the same as The Runaways' bio. This movie makes it seem as if The Runaways ended when she left the band. NO! Thank God at the end there is print for us to read that told us the truth: That after Cherie left, Joan Jett continued with the band for two more years, whereby she sang all the songs. Why didn't Joan continue the rest of the story of the band with the producers? In fact, their first album without Cherie (third overall), Waitin' For The Night, I bought at a record store in either '77 or '78 whose land today is occupied by the mall that houses the very theatre where I saw this movie! It also must be a head-scratcher to movie-goers not familiar with the band: If this is a Runaways bio, why do they seem to be concentrating mostly on the lead singer's life? With only a bit about the guitarist's life and almost nothing about the other members? Now, I'm a Runaways fan, so I didn't mind all the stuff with Cherie and her family, and I wasn't thrilled at first with how the film only concentrates on Cherie and Joan, but there may not have been room for five different points of view, and I'm happy with the screen time the Sandy West and Lita Ford characters do have. In fact, Lita and Joan do get into an argument near the end. It does suck there is no Jackie Fox. But where was their No. 2 most well-known song (after 'Cherry Bomb'), 'Queens Of Noise?' I was looking forward to seeing the girls perform that song. It is listed in the credits, so.....was there a snippet of the song so small I missed it? Someone help me on that one. If the song really wasn't in the movie, shame on the producers for that. It would have been cool if the Kim Fowley character made mention of the two songwriting credits he got on Kiss' Destroyer during The Runaways' Cherie Currie years, too."

For the references I made above that I didn't name because only Winnipeggers would understand them: Of course, The Runaways played at the Globe Cinema, which is in Portage Place, and which stands on the very same piece of land the record store The Wherehouse used to be in the '70s, and where I bought the Waitin' For The Night album. So I guess it's apropos that the film played at the Globe! I return to the scene of the crime 32 years later!

The Beau Zone Now On Blogspot!

2010-02-21T23:05:00.000-08:00

As Triple H of Degeneration X would bellow, "ARE YOU READY?"

Good, because this is the official relaunch and rechristening of THE BEAU ZONE in its' new home on Blogspot.

The Beau Zone, for those who aren't aware, is where you'll find all my controversial opinions on everything that aren't usually reflected in regular media, Winnipeg or otherwise, along with some cool pop culture jokes. Although, I admit, lately, there's been more of those pop culture jokes than anything else. That's because there hasn't been time for me to assimilate the longer opinion pieces in with the funny stuff. You see, when The Beau Zone was formerly a page of my website on my old TV show, Hard Rock Heroes (http://www.hardrockheroes.com ), I had a page to fill and change every two months. Well, two months became six, and as I write this, I haven't done a new Beau Zone in a year. No time. The material is certainly there; most of what's on The Beau Zone is just copy and paste from stuff I write for other purposes. So what I have decided to do, for a variety of reasons, is to take The Beau Zone off of the Hard Rock Heroes site and move it to this Blogspot page, where I have the luxury of doing one post at a time. I don't have to fill up a whole page at a time anymore. Additionally, the archives are all here; I don't have to keep them elsewhere anymore, like on that MySpace page that will now function as just my personal MySpace page. (Meaning it took me a few months to redo the archives, i.e., to copy and paste them onto this Blogspot site.) So lick it up, people, and if you want to act out this symbolic christening by chucking a bottle of beer at the wall and smashing it all over the place, you're completely welcome to it. Hey, what's a party without smashed beer bottles all over the floor? And look at all the items on the left you can click on that take you to the entries in the archives; isn't that cool? That's one of the things about Blogspot I feel more comfortable with now. So I'll leave you with that for now; I want this writeup to be front and center for a while so I'm still going to hold off on any new entries for at least a month. I'll probably still do the pro wrestling entries in a conglomeration of several items, like the way I used to end off each Beau Zone on the Hard Rock Heroes site with the pro wrestling comments. They'll just appear whenever now, that's all. So call or e-mail all of your friends, friends with benefits, co-workers, co-workers with benefits, lovers, enemies, teachers, family, parole officers, and anyone else, and tell them THE BEAU ZONE IS NOW ON BLOGSPOT and that IT'S READY TO ROCK!

Pro Wrestling Comments

2010-01-30T15:19:00.001-08:00

ORIGINALLY POSTED ON THE TWELFTH EDITION OF "THE BEAU ZONE" ON THE HARD ROCK HEROES WEBSITE FROM NOVEMBER 2008 TO FEBRUARY 2010.

It looks like Vickie Guerrero on Smackdown has made something of the catch phrase, "EXCUSE ME!" Don Callis as Cyrus in the original ECW tried, but he didn't make his entrance often enough before the TNN show was pulled.

Speaking of Don Callis, the act of The Brian Kendrick and Ezeikel on Smackdown seems to be someone's ripoff of Don Callis as The Natural when he had Bad News Allen as his bodyguard in Tony Condello's IWA Hardcore, which was the last thing Allen did before retiring, and the last thing Callis did as The Natural before heading off to WWE as The Jackyl. Allen dressed up in that same white outfit Ezeikel wears.

And speaking of Vickie, when she punished referee Charles Robinson for his conduct, I guess she was remembering when J.J. Dillon replaced Ric Flair with him as acting president of WCW on Nitro from Fargo, North Dakota in April 1999 (I was there) after Roddy Piper had Flair committed to the insane asylum the previous week in Gainesville, Florida. (Remember Robinson and Flair talking on split-screen?)

And speaking of Flair, on Raw, when he and Chris Jericho were going to go outside to fight, I was wondering if Jericho might get locked out again like he did on Nitro when he had his security team, including Ralphus, and he locked himself out of the building and couldn't get back in. In the ring, Wrath was watching all this on the screen and figured if Jericho couldn't go to him, he'd go to Jericho. So he left the ring, went backstage, went outside, and they had their match outside. (FUN FACT: The bar First Avenue in Minneapolis is where Prince filmed Purple Rain. Years later, they built the Target Center kitty-corner from First Avenue. When Nitro was at Target Center, there was another match where Jericho and his opponent (forgot who) wrestled outside into the street and I could see First Avenue behind them. Cool!)

I heard a comment from an audience member on MTV Live on MTV Canada when they were talking about colleges and universities: "Well, you know the saying, if you can hold a fork, you can go to York." I chuckled as I remembered Trish Stratus went to York.

WWE has released Stevie Richards, but here's something I had written about him before he was released that no one ever says: The reason WWE fans don't react to Stevie Richards is because they don't get why Steven Richards of the Right To Censor looks like that. Now, I don't remember myself, but what was the angle to end the Right To Censor? I have a feeling there wasn't one. So WWE just dropped it and the leader, Steven Richards, grows his hair again and inexplicably slowly morphs into what original-ECW fans know as Stevie Richards. Without any promos. And so the fans are confused. Ever since the Right To Censor ended, WWE fans just don't know what to make of this man. Can he even be salvaged in WWE? It's amazing he's even still there.

Regarding the May 9 and May 16, 2008 Smackdowns, where they had the winner of the battle royal become the new World Heavyweight Champion: Why couldn't Teddy Long (in Vickie Guerrero's absence) or Michael Cole/Mick Foley bring up the following points: 1) If Edge was medically cleared to wrestle during the battle royal, couldn't they have brought up the fact that he was supposed to wrestle and defeat someone in a qualifying match first? If there is no time for such a match because the battle royal is taking place, that's not fair, it's in favor of Edge, and it's something the announcers could easily have brought up as heat on Edge. Instead, no one brought that point up. 2) And if Edge is going to run out into that battle royal, how is it that he wins just by spearing Batista off the ring apron? I thought that the way you eliminate anyone in a battle royal is by throwing them over the top rope. Edge did not throw Batista over the top rope. He just pushed him from the ring apron onto the floor. Batista should have gotten back in the ring. He was not eliminated. Now, WWE could have still done all this and have the announcers deliberately not bring it up until after the match, which in this case would be on next week's show, but the problem with doing all this is that, although it puts heat on Edge, it portrays the WWE's referees that worked that battle royal as a bunch of incompetents.

Paris Hilton/Lindsay Lohan Stuff

2010-01-30T15:17:00.000-08:00

ORIGINALLY POSTED ON THE TWELFTH EDITION OF "THE BEAU ZONE" ON THE HARD ROCK HEROES WEBSITE FROM NOVEMBER 2008 TO FEBRUARY 2010.

Okay, so Lindsay Lohan was in rehab, right? And she was there the first time when Paris Hilton was released from prison, right? So Paris goes on Larry King Live on CNN and Larry asks her about Lindsay and Britney and she gives reserved answers, then he asks her something about rehab and she says, "I have no friends in rehab." OOOOOHH!!! So Lindsay's not her friend? I guess "frenemy" IS the correct word! I'm surprised the media didn't jump all over this!

Avril Lavigne/Verizon Wireless Stuff

2010-01-30T15:16:00.000-08:00

ORIGINALLY POSTED ON THE TWELFTH EDITION OF "THE BEAU ZONE" ON THE HARD ROCK HEROES WEBSITE FROM NOVEMBER 2008 TO FEBRUARY 2010.

Those new Verizon Wireless phones where you point the phone at a playing song and the phone identifies it really work! I heard the new Avril Lavigne song "Girlfriend" and pointed my phone at it and the display read "I Wanna Be Your Boyfriend" by The Rubinoos!

More Short Snappers

2010-01-30T15:14:00.000-08:00

ORIGINALLY POSTED ON THE TWELFTH EDITION OF "THE BEAU ZONE" ON THE HARD ROCK HEROES WEBSITE FROM NOVEMBER 2008 TO FEBRUARY 2010.

How about some MORE short old stuff? Both these two are about 2007 award shows.....Belly is performing at the Muchmusic Video Awards this year? Wonder if he'll ".....feel the pressure....." Hey, maybe BFFs Hilary Duff and Leah Miller can be the ".....females doing what they want to do.....".....At the 2007 MTV Movie Awards, when they did the gag with Sarah Silverman and Jessica Biel almost kissing, they should have spliced in the shot of Justin Timberlake looking intently as he was looking at the Britney/Madonna kiss at the VMAs that other year.

Kiss Stuff

2010-01-30T15:13:00.000-08:00

ORIGINALLY POSTED ON THE TWELFTH EDITION OF "THE BEAU ZONE" ON THE HARD ROCK HEROES WEBSITE FROM NOVEMBER 2008 TO FEBRUARY 2010.

While we're on the subject of Kiss, Gene Simmons once said he'd like to brand the air we breathe as "Kiss Air" so that every time we'd take a breath, we'd owe him money. I think this puts Gene in a quandry: "Kiss Air" would make more money than "Gene Simmons Air" but for "Kiss Air" Gene would have to give 50% of the profits to Paul Stanley.

Ace Frehley Stuff

2010-01-30T15:11:00.001-08:00

ORIGINALLY POSTED ON THE TWELFTH EDITION OF "THE BEAU ZONE" ON THE HARD ROCK HEROES WEBSITE FROM NOVEMBER 2008 TO FEBRUARY 2010.

Ace Frehley played the Garrick Centre on March 12 of this year. Could you imagine if Winnipeg Kiss tribute band The Paul Stanleys had opened up for him? Ace Frehley and The Paul Stanleys both in one night? Two top acts on the same bill? "Two sides of the coin to choose from....."

Or how about this: After The Paul Stanleys have played basically an opening set, the main Paul says "We got one more song, now for this song,....." as he motions to the "Ace" Paul and does his "We got a little surprise for you tonight, we're going to turn the microphone over to....." speech. But just as he's about to say "Paul Stanley," Ace walks out and says "I'll handle it from here, curly," and proceeds to sing Shock Me himself. Then Ace says, "We're going to take a break now, stick around for ME with my own band!" Then the fans can slap that clip of that one song Ace did with The Paul Stanleys all over You Tube. Wishful thinking, I guess. Alas, "words are not enough....." Or will it be "a darkness never ending?" Maybe if The Paul Stanleys had just talked to the promoter. They could have said to him, "Talk to me, talk to me, all I want is a little conversation....."

O.J. Simpson/Michael Richards Stuff

2010-01-30T15:10:00.000-08:00

ORIGINALLY POSTED ON THE TWELFTH EDITION OF "THE BEAU ZONE" ON THE HARD ROCK HEROES WEBSITE FROM NOVEMBER 2008 TO FEBRUARY 2010.

So now that FOX has cancelled the O.J. Simpson TV special and book, here's a great idea for what they can replace the TV show with: How about locking O.J. in a room with Michael Richards and let's see what happens. There's your TV special.

Short Snappers

2010-01-30T15:08:00.000-08:00

ORIGINALLY POSTED ON THE TWELFTH EDITION OF "THE BEAU ZONE" ON THE HARD ROCK HEROES WEBSITE FROM NOVEMBER 2008 TO FEBRUARY 2010.

Due to my writeup on greatest hits albums last time, a lot of comments piled up. Some of them are getting old. Like these, but they're still funny, and they're short, so I'll just lump them all together here.....Rosie O'Donnell is now trying to get Bob Barker's hosting gig on The Price Is Right after he retires. Bob says that's okay with him as long as she gets spayed and neutered.....The White Stripes are playing all three territories on their tour: Yukon, NWT, and Nunavut. If it's cold up there, they'll REALLY be concerned about ".....the hardest button to button.....".....So Fergie liked Alanis' You Tube video of "My Humps" so much she gave her a cake shaped like an ass? Alanis needs a knife to cut that cake now, I guess. Too bad she has ".....10,000 spoons when all she needs is a knife....." Hey, maybe that cake tastes Fergalicious!.....You know what song Rod Stewart should have covered on that rock classics album he did? Kiss' "Hard Luck Woman!"

21 (The Movie) Stuff

2010-01-30T15:06:00.000-08:00

ORIGINALLY POSTED ON THE TWELFTH EDITION OF "THE BEAU ZONE" ON THE HARD ROCK HEROES WEBSITE FROM NOVEMBER 2008 TO FEBRUARY 2010.

Regarding the movie 21: I was confused and dumbfounded at Laurence Fishburne's role. He's doing surveillance for several casinos at once? Doesn't each casino have their own surveillance personnel? And face-recognition software is coming in NOW??? You mean it hasn't been around for years and years already? Or have I been watching too much Las Vegas (the series)? I always wondered if the degree of technology that Danny McCoy and Mike Cannon were using was really as sophisticated as what the casinos use. But I always figured it was to SOME degree computerized, for the TV show to even suggest what they were presenting. Laurence Fishburne's job and character reminds me in so many ways of a '70s movie. Oh, and one more thing: Too bad the gang didn't play blackjack at the Mirage - once Jim Sturgess saw all that Beatles Love paraphenelia around, maybe it would have inspired him to break out into Beatles songs!

One Tree Hill Stuff

2010-01-30T15:03:00.000-08:00

ORIGINALLY POSTED ON THE TWELFTH EDITION OF "THE BEAU ZONE" ON THE HARD ROCK HEROES WEBSITE FROM NOVEMBER 2008 TO FEBRUARY 2010.

On One Tree Hill, Peyton started her own record company. You know the album covers from the '70s and '80s she used to decorate her office wall? As an inside joke, she should have added a Huey Lewis album cover. You know how he played Hayley's father? (And are Haley's parents STILL travelling the country in that Winnebago four years later?)

Pro Wrestling Comments

2010-01-30T14:55:00.000-08:00

ORIGINALLY POSTED ON THE ELEVENTH EDITION OF "THE BEAU ZONE" ON THE HARD ROCK HEROES WEBSITE FROM MARCH TO NOVEMBER 2008.

On Saturday Night's Main Event this past August 18, in the illegitimate child angle, Johnathan Coachman talks about Vince McMahon being at an afterparty in L.A. after Wrestlemania 2 in 1986 and brings out Melina as a possible daughter. Vince McMahon wasn't in L.A. for Wrestlemania 2. He was in New York commentating with Susan Saint James. That was the three-city Wrestlemania with the celebrity commentators. L.A. had Jesse Ventura and Elvira (with Lord Alfred Hayes added at the last minute) and Chicago had Gorilla Monsoon and Cathy Lee Crosby (with Gene Okerlund added at the last minute). McMahon and Saint James were at Nassau Colisseum and SNME was at New York's Madison Square Garden, so the crowd should have groaned at that, except that most of the crowd now is probably too young to remember 1986. Also, the live crowd doesn't hear the commentators, for those in the crowd that do remember because they were in the arena, and furthermore, as I recall, McMahon and Saint James were not in the arena at ringside but were doing their commentary from a table in the back for some reason.

When Vince McMahon's "demise" happened on Raw with the limo blowing up, I first thought....."The Voodoo Kin Mafia finally succeeded!" Good thing they never took credit for it on TNA TV, what with the Benoit thing happening right after that and Vince, not in character, forced to show his face on TV.

In TNA, next time Brother Ray tells a house show crowd that he'd rather masturbate with broken glass, Abyss should show up with the bag of broken glass and pour it in the ring and invite Ray to utilize it.

The wrestling media says WWE doesn't want to promote Marcus Cor Von as a former NFL linebacker because that's the way TNA promoted him. So it was funny in that battle royal he was in on Raw with all three commentating teams when JBL and Tazz were arguing about him and JBL brings up the point, "But he played in a Super Bowl, Tazz!" Leave it to JBL, who can say whatever the hell he wants out there. (Since that time, Cor Von has left WWE.)

If James Storm ever finds himself in the same ring as Steve Austin, his gimmick still works, because the heel drinks his beer out of a bottle. The face drinks his out of cans. Bottles are more dangerous than cans. Storm hits people over the head with his beer bottle. Maybe he'll hit Austin one day. So it makes sense. If anyone thinks this feud will never happen, well, maybe that's why TNA now has Stone Cold Shark Boy! (Even though he too, drinks, or "drinks," his drink of choice, which isn't beer but clam juice, out of bottles.)

WWE fired Cryme Time, and I wonder if this had something to do with it: Cryme Tyme get no reaction from the crowd because the fans can't understand why these guys are supposed to be faces with all the henious things they've done. Some of the stuff they've done in their skits is funny, but it really only works if they're heels. I think this is what you get when you take "cool heels" and make them babyfaces. Cyrus used to say on the former Joe & Cyrus wrestling radio show that he hates cool heels because the crowd makes them the babyface. I don't agree, because the actions of the heels are still henious. They just conduct themselves in such a fashion that gets the alternative members of society - which isn't the majority in a crowd of arena wrestling fans - to be fans of them, but ONLY because the goings-on in pro wrestling are just storyline. My friends and I used to cheer Jesse Ventura and Adrian Adonis in the AWA in the '70s. We knew their attitudes weren't real. But most wrestling fans aren't that sophisticated, they're more like sheep, so they'll continue to boo "cool heels." I just wonder if someone in WWE was doing this on purpose, to show that cool heels can't really be actual babyfaces.

Various David Cassidy Comments

2010-01-30T14:53:00.000-08:00

ORIGINALLY POSTED ON THE ELEVENTH EDITION OF "THE BEAU ZONE" ON THE HARD ROCK HEROES WEBSITE FROM MARCH TO NOVEMBER 2008.

For the space remaining before we get into the wrestling section, maybe I'll throw in some comments regarding David Cassidy's recent Winnipeg concerts at Club Regent on February 13 and 14, 2008:

1) Before the show, I was singing, "Point Me In The Direction of Club Regent....."

2) Originally, David was only booked to play on Feb. 14. When that show sold out quickly, the promoters added the Feb. 13 date. Since he was in town overnight, I wonder if he decided to wander around the casino with a guitar. Maybe he would have seen guys playing cards. Maybe he would have gone up to them, strummed his guitar, and sang, "He's bluffing with a pair of sevens." (Partridge Family viewers would get that.)

3) Now, when I arrived at Club Regent for the show, where was that Partridge Family bus that someone in this city owns? I fully expected to see it in the parking lot as a gag. (Unless it was there the previous night.) As well as a photo-op in one of the papers with David Cassidy walking off that bus. Someone blew a great opportunity.

4) Not related to the show, but a cute nostalgic story I e-mailed someone: Several of my albums were bought at the late, great Stereo Swap Shop that was formerly at the corner of Osborne and Gertrude. It's now a hair salon who's name my brain has a mental block of not remembering. My friends and I rode the bus from St. Vital all the time to buy records there. I once bought a John Mayall album at the now-former Fernwood IGA for $3.00 and got $4.00 credit at Swap Shop for it. Unfortunately, in the late '70s, my friends convinced me to take all my Archies and Partridge Family and Brady Kids records there for credit and trade them in for Aerosmith or whatever. So that's basically how and why I now seek out greatest hits collections of those groups on CD today. At least I have the best songs on CD now, back in my collection.

Greatest Hits Albums

2010-01-30T14:49:00.000-08:00

ORIGINALLY POSTED ON THE ELEVENTH EDITION OF "THE BEAU ZONE" ON THE HARD ROCK HEROES WEBSITE FROM MARCH TO NOVEMBER 2008.

Something a little different this time around on The Beau Zone. A few weeks ago, Winnipeg Free Press writer David Sanderson asked me to contribute something to an article he was writing for the paper's Saturday Detour section on the 50th anniversary of the greatest hits album. I initially thought that meant I would be quoted in his article, but instead he just put some of my comments, along with other Winnipeg celebrities' comments, in a certain section of the page alongside the article. So he took a few of my many comments I e-mailed him and squished them together the best he could. I kind of feel some of what he printed was taken out of context, although if he had printed what my context was, I admit the resulting piece would have been too long. Nevertheless, since I'm overdue for a new Beau Zone, I thought I'd reprint my original e-mail to him here in the next few paragraphs for your pleasure. Enjoy.

Thanks for thinking of me, David. I have to generally go into my vinyl albums, because I don't have time to really think about the CD compilations that come out now, although I buy some of them. It was in the '70s that my friends and I played albums over and over and really got to know them. For this reason, greatest hits albums were a bit off our radar, because we had the songs already and they didn't have the flow we already had become accustomed to from the individual albums. Live albums made the songs flow better.

That being said, I took a quick look at my record collection, and, although I can't decide upon one all-time favorite, here are some random thoughts:

1) I love Kiss' "Double Platinum," their first greatest hits collection from 1978 that they entrusted Jimmy Iovine to remix, where he made new versions of some of the songs, although they weren't that happy with some of the resulting tracks. Some of what he did that I love included Hard Luck Woman where the drums don't come in until the second verse, or Calling Dr. Love, with the added mystery in the intro and the effect of emphasis on the sleazy guitar line during the chorus when Gene's vocal is removed right after the guitar solo.

2) "All The Best from Prism" had a lot of airplay at friends' parties when it came out, just 'cause they were one of those bands that "passed us by," so to speak, but had enough hits that a greatest hits collection that captured them all sufficed perfectly.

3) Streetheart: There's never been a decent Streetheart greatest hits compilation. Formerly, this seemed to be due to the band appearing on two different record companies in its' career and the problems that entails, probably financially, to include songs from both record companies on one compilation. The Rolling Stones can do it, but they obviously have way more money than anyone connected with Streetheart. The "60 Minutes With Streetheart" CD (now out of print, I believe) on Capitol had to include live versions of their WEA songs. I guess those songs were unavailable for a Capitol release. "Action: The Best Of Streetheart" only comprises their WEA stuff after Streetheart left WEA and is basically a too-early compilation. Recently, whoever is doing the "Essential" CDs put out "The Essential Streetheart" with songs from both record companies, but it has only around ten tracks just thrown together without rhyme or reason. I hate CDs like that. The first song doesn't sound like it should be the first song on the CD, etc. I didn't have time to remember who put that out, if it was Capitol or who. There's an interesting very early cover photo of the band, probably when they were called Witness, I believe even pre-Paul Dean/Matt Frenette, that probably has other members who have left, but there's no liner notes or anything telling us about that photo or anything else. Just completely slipshod. Streetheart needs a worthy greatest hits album that has between 15 and 20 songs on it.

4) Beatles: I have a soft spot for 1976's "Rock And Roll Music," a double album with all their uptempo songs mixed to sound louder and brasher. I guess this is more of a "compilation" and less of a "greatest hits" album. For a real greatest hits album, I don't know what's better: "20 Greatest Hits" (is that still in print?), their new CD "No. 1s," or the vinyl-but-CD-or-boxed-set-styled-in-hindsight albums 1962-66 and 1967-70. Depends what mood you're in at the time, I guess.

5) "Aerosmith's Greatest Hits:" I always like it when greatest hits albums pick up wayward tracks that were singles only or given to movie soundtracks. In this case, it was "Come Together" from the Sgt. Pepper soundtrack. This album also makes me think of the Aerosmith biography where Joe Perry talks about how, during the time he wasn't in the band and was doing The Joe Perry Project, some kid gave him this album to autograph and it was the first time he had ever heard of it or seen it. No one had told him of its' release.

6) Recent CDs? Well, before I was into hard rock, I was into '70s pop and bubblegum, so I absolutely adore "Absolutely The Best Of The Archies" and The Partridge Family "Greatest Hits." And yes, I'm going to see David Cassidy. Ace Frehley, too, for that matter. Along the same vein, very valuable is TimeLife's "AM Top Twenty: Sounds Of The Seventies," an excellent collection that contains such early '70s AM gems as The Night Chicago Died, Billy Don't Be A Hero, and Rock Me Gently. The only CD I've ever bought from an infomercial. My most-played non-Kiss CD. I also like "The Best Of Foghat," because they did blues-boogie, but my friends and I liked their straight hard rock stuff, so their albums were spotty to us. Their live album, "Foghat Live," was one of our top albums. So "The Best Of Foghat" effectively collects all their best hard rock tracks. The CD "Anthology" by Angel (remember them, with their white outfits?) needs more songs from the "Sinful" album.

7) Have to include this: In the "Television's Greatest Hits" records/CDs, my favorites are volumes 2 and 5 with the most memorable sitcom and cartoon TV theme songs. The first one is good, too.

Pro Wrestling Comments

2010-01-30T14:44:00.000-08:00

ORIGINALLY POSTED ON THE TENTH EDITION OF "THE BEAU ZONE" ON THE HARD ROCK HEROES WEBSITE FROM JUNE 2007 TO MARCH 2008.

Remember when DX vandalized that Muscle & Fitness cover with Vince McMahon on the cover? When they were done, the pic of Vince looked just like Danny Bonaduce!

I wonder if, that time when doing play-by-play, King Booker had Vince in his headset telling him to tell stories instead of calling the holds in the match. (Only insiders will get this.)

In Torrie Wilson's recent FHM cover story interview, she says she'd like to have sex with someone under the ring. Hopefully she'll stick to Raw if she wants to do that. Hopefully she didn't try to do that at pay-per-views, 'cause does she realize there's probably that leprechaun, Hornswaggle, under the ring? Could you imagine that little bastard surprising Torrie and her companion under there? Not only that, JBL says he'd pay money to watch leprechauns copulate. I wonder if he means two leprechauns or just Hornswaggle with Torrie Wilson. The possibilities are endless.....

JBL's funniest line on Smackdown a few weeks ago, during a Miz match: "The Miz couldn't afford my escort service bills!"

Speaking of JBL, how come on Smackdown they can't promote Saturday Night's Main Event because it's on a competing network, yet JBL can talk about his Fox News appearances all the time?

Before WWE let Joey Mercury go, I was thinking: Why is MNM making Smackdown appearances? I thought Nitro and Melina were fired by Teddy Long. How is he allowing their return? Shows you why Krystal is right about him needing an assistant. Maybe they snuck on while he was watching Kane's "See No Evil" DVD. That was funny a few weeks ago: I think to myself, "Teddy Long's going to watch a DVD during Smackdown?" Then JBL said the same thing!

Dora The Explorer Comment

2010-01-30T14:43:00.000-08:00

ORIGINALLY POSTED ON THE TENTH EDITION OF "THE BEAU ZONE" ON THE HARD ROCK HEROES WEBSITE FROM JUNE 2007 TO MARCH 2008.

I see Dora The Explorer talking crayons will be in stores for Christmas. I wonder if those crayons will have anything to say about the Dora The Explorer rectal thermometers currently on the market.

Lindsay Lohan Comment

2010-01-30T14:42:00.000-08:00

ORIGINALLY POSTED ON THE TENTH EDITION OF "THE BEAU ZONE" ON THE HARD ROCK HEROES WEBSITE FROM JUNE 2007 TO MARCH 2008.

Alice Cooper should visit Lindsay Lohan at her Wonderland rehab facility. Then you'd have Alice in Wonderland! Or John Mayer could write a song about Lindsay in rehab. He can call it "Your Body Is In Wonderland."

B.J. Thomas/Red River Ex Comment

2010-01-30T14:41:00.000-08:00

ORIGINALLY POSTED ON THE TENTH EDITION OF "THE BEAU ZONE" ON THE HARD ROCK HEROES WEBSITE FROM JUNE 2007 TO MARCH 2008.

This comment is a year late, but so what? BJ Thomas at the Ex? Does anyone really want to sit outdoors and hear him sing, "Raindrops keep falling on my head.....?" Look what happened after The Guess Who sang Rain Dance at Canwest Global Park in 2000!

Beauty Pageants And The Whole Tara Conner Thing

2010-01-30T14:39:00.000-08:00

ORIGINALLY POSTED ON THE TENTH EDITION OF "THE BEAU ZONE" ON THE HARD ROCK HEROES WEBSITE FROM JUNE 2007 TO MARCH 2008.

Regarding beauty pageants and the whole Tara Conner thing: If they're looking for fine upstanding role models to be pageant winners, they're going to have to look again at girls and women who look like Ugly Betty or Rosanne or Rosie O'Donnell. Because in 2006/2007, you show me a hot sexy babe in miniskirts and high heels who looks like Tara Conner or Katie Rees, and I'll show you.....well, those notorious pics of Katie Rees! Or a porno star or pop star or spokesmodel or actress or something. (Look at the girls on/in car magazines.) Hot babes rule and they know what they want to be, what they want to do, where they want to go (as in hot nightclubs for debauchery from late night to dawn) and how to make big money nowadays. It's empowerment. Why? How? The socialogical aspects of that would fill up a book. Little girls, say 10 years old, are good girls. But when they grow up to be Katie Rees or Lindsay Lohan, the "good girl gone bad" deal is immensely titilating, and the girls know it now, and to them it's exciting. Let's face it, hot babes and money rule now. So I don't think the hot babes you saw winning beauty pageants in the past are going to be the girls who are role models who really contribute to society anymore. The image just doesn't correlate. And really, to me these concepts are happening 25 years later, as I worked at McDonald's in the early '80s with all the heavy metal babes. I know firsthand from back then what behavior hot chicks really exhibit. Just read the lyrics to Streetheart's 1982 hit "Snow White." Heck, girls wore jeans and high heels to the bars all the time then - it took 25 years for that look to hit The Bay and Sears and Old Navy catalogs! I guess the people who put those catalogs together go to bed way before prime bar hours where the girls go out dressed to kill. But now it's all on the internet the next day. And now we're back to Katie Rees! Hey, this comment has come full circle!

Richie Sambora/Charlie Sheen Comment

2010-01-30T14:38:00.001-08:00

ORIGINALLY POSTED ON THE TENTH EDITION OF "THE BEAU ZONE" ON THE HARD ROCK HEROES WEBSITE FROM JUNE 2007 TO MARCH 2008.

Regarding gossip in the celeb mags, if Charlie Sheen finds out his kid is really Richie Sambora's, Richie will be "Wanted, Dead Or Alive!"

Various Nickelback Comments

2010-01-30T14:36:00.000-08:00

ORIGINALLY POSTED ON THE TENTH EDITION OF "THE BEAU ZONE" ON THE HARD ROCK HEROES WEBSITE FROM JUNE 2007 TO MARCH 2008.

Chad Kroeger is No. 6 on the list of un-sexy people. They looked at a picture of him. "Look at this photograph, every time I do it makes me laugh....." (Did that make you laugh?) Also, Chad Kroeger was arrested for drunk driving. Guess he was ".....feeling way too damn good!"

Various O.C. Comments

2010-01-30T14:35:00.000-08:00

ORIGINALLY POSTED ON THE TENTH EDITION OF "THE BEAU ZONE" ON THE HARD ROCK HEROES WEBSITE FROM JUNE 2007 TO MARCH 2008.

Regarding the cancellation of The O.C., creator Joss Schwartz said he'd secretly love to produce a spinoff with Julie and Kaitlynn as sort of the anti-Gilmore Girls. Hey, maybe Julie and Kaitlynn can have a threeway with Sebastian Bach! Speaking of The O.C., I liked it when that girl told Kaitlynn earlier this year she was throwing a Pimp And Ho party for her sweet 16 bash. Hey, now that's what we should see on My Super Sweet 16!

Falcon Beach/Winnipeg On TV Comment

2010-01-30T14:33:00.000-08:00

ORIGINALLY POSTED ON THE TENTH EDITION OF "THE BEAU ZONE" ON THE HARD ROCK HEROES WEBSITE FROM JUNE 2007 TO MARCH 2008.

I wrote this a while ago, so I better get this in before the now-cancelled Falcon Beach leaves our minds: Isn't it ironic that my home town of Winnipeg, that the world seems to revolve around, can be mentioned on Jan. 7's Desperate Housewives on ABC and Jan. 11's 30 Rock on NBC, but when those of you who are Americans watch Falcon Beach where the characters are going to see Matt Mays, instead of saying they're going to Winnipeg to see him, you probably saw them say the name of some New Hampshire town. That's because everything is Americanized for the U.S. version of Falcon Beach on ABC Family. Well, I'm here to tell you boys and girls that the fictional resort town of Falcon Beach is really supposed to be set in the Grand Beach area of Manitoba, Canada, one hour north of Winnipeg. So when the characters need to come to the city for anything, that city is Winnipeg. All Canadian references are reshot by the production company and the cast to replace them with American references for the U.S. version. Europe gets the proper Canadian version, too. So I wonder if, when Paige and Jason went to Winnipeg to see Matt Mays, Orson's first wife was also at that show? Think she'd like Matt Mays?

A Note From Beau

2010-01-30T14:32:00.000-08:00

ORIGINALLY POSTED ON THE TENTH EDITION OF "THE BEAU ZONE" ON THE HARD ROCK HEROES WEBSITE FROM JUNE 2007 TO MARCH 2008.

Wow. June 2007. I haven't changed this Beau Zone since November. Seven months! A big part of that was my poor health over the winter. I had to have cataract surgery at the same time as I had horrible sinus problems. When they put you out for the surgery, you have to be able to breathe, and you can't when your sinuses are always blocked. Thankfully, the surgery is over, and the sinus problems are at least under control if not fully fixed at this time, to make long stories short. At least when I go to bed now I don't wake up two hours later because I can't breathe and have to squirt more Claritin mist up my nose. Plus I've gotten semi-addicted to My Space, where, as you may know, the Beau Zone Archives are kept in the form of the My Space blog. (Link on title page.) It's fun adding friends like Christina Aguilera, Paris Hilton, Burton Cummings, and assorted Winnipeg hot chicks. It's fun posting and reading comments. And it's fun listening to music. So with that, well, let's see how often The Beau Zone gets done now. So with that in mind, off to the comments.....

Pro Wrestling Comments

2010-01-25T01:32:00.000-08:00

ORIGINALLY POSTED ON THE NINTH EDITION OF "THE BEAU ZONE" ON THE HARD ROCK HEROES WEBSITE FROM NOVEMBER 2006 TO JUNE 2007.

Too bad Kevin Nash is under contract with TNA. If it wasn't for that, WWE could do DX vs. the NWO! Shawn and HHH vs. Hall and Nash! And Hall and Nash could have Eric Bischoff as their manager! It's never been done before! Vince could sic the NWO on DX! And the end of the match would have some kind of non-finish where the NWO turns and all four guys plus Bischoff celebrate in the ring! (MSG revisited!) Then Vince'll come out all pissed off and make a match, 5 on 5, with DX, the NWO, and Bischoff, vs. the Spirit Squad. Hey, it fits! Then Bischoff could drop out, saying he's not a wrestler, and replace himself with Sean Waltman, who of course was in BOTH the NWO and DX! Now, there's a match!

On the April 1 edition of TNA, I like it when James Mitchell says, "Christian, wherever you're hiding this week....." He was hiding here in Winnipeg at the World Of Wheels car show! I wonder if James Mitchell knew that. Maybe he and Abyss could have terrorized him here, too, after beating him up at his home. They sure would have had a lot of cars to choose from, to smash him onto. Hey, maybe Mitchell could have gotten Honky Tonk Man to join in! I should have gone. I should have asked Christian, "Aren't you feeling nervous signing autographs here when James Mitchell was terrorizing your wife at your home last week? Where's she today? Could he be doing it again?" What would Christian have said, knowing that that night on TNA Impact Mitchell would play the tape of him and Abyss beating him up in his own home? I could have shown Christian the Chris Jericho clipping, too, showing him how Jericho was running to be the next Manitoba Conservative leader, before the Winnipeg Sun revealed that to be a hoax the next day. I never thought about Christian when I saw that. For the record, I was fooled for about 30 seconds until I got back into my car after buying the Sun. "Wait a sec!" I thought, after realizing what day it was. I was wondering if it was that or the Craig Ferguson story (him maybe doing the Late Late Show here in Winnipeg for a week) that was a hoax. The third front-page story about Winnipeg gas stations charging for air I thought was probably true, as I paid 50 cents for air in Grand Forks, ND last fall. Hey, who needs Wrestlemania weekend when we've got our own stuff going on here in Winnipeg, the city the whole world revolves around?

I read in the gossip mags Stacy Keibler is now acting as a matchmaker for Nick Lachey, who obviously she met through his brother Drew on Dancing With The Stars. Maybe she'll hook him up with a WWE Diva. Well, not Mickie James, of course, she doesn't swing that way. Nick needs to ask himself if Mickie James will interfere in this in any way! He doesn't want whoever Stacy fixes him up with fooling around with Mickie James! (Hey, see the Pussycat Dolls comment above!)

Every time I hear the commentators say "Angle slam" during a Kurt Angle match, it makes me want to eat a breakfast dish called an Angle Slam at Perkins.

Shelton Benjamin's mama should seek out Simon Dean and try out his patented Simon system, don't you think?

So all I have left now is just some jokes on if Chris Jericho did become premier of Manitoba: 1) Instead of a press conference, he could have the Highlight Reel. 2) He could get new generations interested in politics - he could "bring the walls down!" 3) He could have been the Ayatollah of Manitoba!

Las Vegas (The TV Show) Comment

2010-01-25T01:31:00.000-08:00

ORIGINALLY POSTED ON THE NINTH EDITION OF "THE BEAU ZONE" ON THE HARD ROCK HEROES WEBSITE FROM NOVEMBER 2006 TO JUNE 2007.

So I guess Jon Bon Jovi's hand wasn't still stuck in that slot machine when the old Montecito blew up at the end of the 2004/2005 season. But if I ever see him with an injured hand, or see his body in ruins, I'm making this joke!

Kiss Coffeehouse & Kiss Cologne Comments

2010-01-25T01:30:00.000-08:00

ORIGINALLY POSTED ON THE NINTH EDITION OF "THE BEAU ZONE" ON THE HARD ROCK HEROES WEBSITE FROM NOVEMBER 2006 TO JUNE 2007.

So a Kiss Coffeehouse has opened up? How about this for the ad:

Hot, hot, hotter than hot coffee,
You know that you can get it well done,
Hot, hot, hotter than hot coffee
On the patio in the midday sun!

And hopefully the people that work there will know who Kiss is. There's Kiss cologne now, too. "Well, I sure smelled something, sure smelled something....."

Nicole Kidman/Keith Urban Comment

2010-01-25T01:29:00.001-08:00

ORIGINALLY POSTED ON THE NINTH EDITION OF "THE BEAU ZONE" ON THE HARD ROCK HEROES WEBSITE FROM NOVEMBER 2006 TO JUNE 2007.

So Nicole Kidman wants Keith Urban to drop his country career and become a pop singer. (".....and then she goes and spoils it all by saying something stupid.....")

David Lee Roth Comment

2010-01-25T01:27:00.000-08:00

ORIGINALLY POSTED ON THE NINTH EDITION OF "THE BEAU ZONE" ON THE HARD ROCK HEROES WEBSITE FROM NOVEMBER 2006 TO JUNE 2007.

So David Lee Roth got fired as Howard Stern's replacement on conventional radio. I can see how it went. Dave: "I ain't the worst that you've seen.....can't you see what I mean?" Dave's now-former bosses: "Might as well jump.....go ahead and jump." Dave now needs to update his resume. "I've got my pencil.....give me something to write on, man." Now that he's out of a job, he might exhibit self-pity: "I ain't got nobody.....nobody cares for me, nobody....."

Daylight Savings Time Comment

2010-01-25T01:26:00.000-08:00

ORIGINALLY POSTED ON THE NINTH EDITION OF "THE BEAU ZONE" ON THE HARD ROCK HEROES WEBSITE FROM NOVEMBER 2006 TO JUNE 2007.

Those new Daylight Savings Times that start next year have one horrible disadvantage. Formerly, you'd get an hour of extra Halloween party time on Saturday night the way the calendar fell. Now that extra hour will be on another week. Darn! (I wonder if until now what the birth rate was at the end of every July.....a spike perhaps, due to that extra hour? Hmmm....)

Various Lindsay Lohan Comments

2010-01-25T01:24:00.000-08:00

ORIGINALLY POSTED ON THE NINTH EDITION OF "THE BEAU ZONE" ON THE HARD ROCK HEROES WEBSITE FROM NOVEMBER 2006 TO JUNE 2007.

Lindsay Lohan covers Cheap Trick's "I Want You To Want Me" on her new album. Hey, maybe she can get the Dream Police to go after her dad!.....That would have been funny if Lindsay Lohan's stolen $1,000,000 bag of jewels was found in Paris Hilton's car when she was pulled over for her DUI. Instead of water pouring out of the car, the cops would have seen jewelry pouring out!.....So Lindsay Lohan is cosying up to Rick Solomon now, the guy who broke up with Shannen Doherty, then made that sex tape with Paris Hilton. Could a Lindsay/Rick tape be in the works, perhaps? Too bad Shannen didn't talk about any of this when she co-hosted The View on July 31/August 1. At least Shannen could have had a catfight with Elisabeth Hasselbeck!

Bryan Adams/Chris Martin Comment

2010-01-25T01:23:00.000-08:00

ORIGINALLY POSTED ON THE NINTH EDITION OF "THE BEAU ZONE" ON THE HARD ROCK HEROES WEBSITE FROM NOVEMBER 2006 TO JUNE 2007.

Did you see the Junos when Chris Martin stumbled over his words and called Bryan Adams "an officer of Canadian customs?" Oh, okay - that's Bryan's other job! He's moonlighting! He's a customs official at the border. I get it now - some guy tried to bring snakeskin leather pants into Canada from the U.S. and Bryan stopped him - that's where ".....put those patent leather pants in the circular file....." came from!

That '70s Show Stuff

2010-01-25T01:21:00.000-08:00

ORIGINALLY POSTED ON THE NINTH EDITION OF "THE BEAU ZONE" ON THE HARD ROCK HEROES WEBSITE FROM NOVEMBER 2006 TO JUNE 2007.

Regarding the "That '70s Show" series finale: That was eerie, the way Eric showed up and how we didn't get to see him at the party greeting his parents. And we didn't even get to see one second of the gang in 1980. I was wondering if we'd hear The Pina Colada Song, since that was the last #1 song of 1979/first #1 song of 1980. And we'll never get to find out Hyde's reaction to Bon Scott of AC/DC dying less than two months after that party, John Bonham dying in September (the same way Bon Scott died, incidentally, by choking on his own vomit while sleeping/passed out), signalling the end of Led Zeppelin, and then the big one - John Lennon being murdered on December 8. Hey, even Peter Criss leaving Kiss in May. Yes, it all happened in 1980!

Pussycat Dolls Comment

2010-01-25T01:20:00.000-08:00

ORIGINALLY POSTED ON THE NINTH EDITION OF "THE BEAU ZONE" ON THE HARD ROCK HEROES WEBSITE FROM NOVEMBER 2006 TO JUNE 2007.

How about the Pussycat Dolls' new single "I Don't Need A Man?" Sounds like your average song title. But when the Pussycat Dolls do a song with that title.....kinda conjures images of something else, don't it? All those delectable things they can do to each other with such, shall we say, tools, as two-pronged dildos and strap-ons, not to mention their tongues. Isn't that what girls do at slumber parties nowadays?

WCMA Anecdote

2010-01-25T01:18:00.000-08:00

ORIGINALLY POSTED ON THE NINTH EDITION OF "THE BEAU ZONE" ON THE HARD ROCK HEROES WEBSITE FROM NOVEMBER 2006 TO JUNE 2007.

I was volunteering at the conference part of the Western Canadian Music Awards this past October. At one session, Keith Macpherson of Easily Amused comes up to the table where my supervisors are sitting and asks where a garbage is. They tell him they haven't seen a garbage anywhere around. "Too bad the tablecloths don't go all the way to the floor," I offered. He looked at me and smiled and made a shoving motion towards the table with his hand. Looks like he was "easily amused" with my comment!

Pro Wrestling Comments

2010-01-18T22:32:00.000-08:00

ORIGINALLY POSTED ON THE EIGHTH EDITION OF "THE BEAU ZONE" ON THE HARD ROCK HEROES WEBSITE FROM MAY TO NOVEMBER 2006.

Concerning Bret Hart and the WWE Hall Of Fame, I always thought Bret should just ask his fans on his website if they wanted to see that happen or not. (If he did, I've never had the time to go on his website.) So now Bret is in. Kudos to Bret: He's had his cake and has eaten it, too. He's a man of integrity, and he's never come back to work for WWE in any capacity, but he did do just the DVD and the Hall of Fame just to preserve his memory and for the fans that wanted to see those things happen. There is one thing I wonder about that I haven't read much about, though: (and I asked Dave Meltzer at the Wrestling Observer Newsletter if, the next time he writes extensively about Bret and Survivor Series 1997, he can go over this) Why did Bret apparently decline to lose the title to Shawn Michaels at house shows in the U.S. that took place before Survivor Series? In Shawn's book, to further his and HHH's arguments why Bret was selfish and wouldn't do business he makes that point. I can't remember what Meltzer said about that in the Observer in the past, if indeed anything.

Hey, how about the new movie on DVD (direct-to-DVD?) "Santa's Slay" with Goldberg as both Santa Claus AND Satan? Satan? Wonder if anyone in the film used a taser to subdue him.

Those stairs on the Jan. 2 Raw that Trish was running back and forth on while Todd Grisham was interviewing her look familiar. Are those the same stairs Brock Lesnar threw Zach Gowen and his wheelchair down on Smackdown?

So let me get this straight.....there's controversy over whether to allow 50 Cent into Canada and he does get allowed in.....and Lex Luger doesn't? And 50 Cent did a tour here before.....and Luger just appeared in Winnipeg in October. I like how Sting on TNA referred to Luger in his ring introduction as an "international fugitive," though.

Wonder how the new CW network will affect network executive Palmer Canon. Will he lose his job? He already indicated when congratulated by Krystal Marshall he wasn't thrilled about the new network. ("Oh yeah, THAT news.")

Maybe Mickie James can snag (shag?) Trish Stratus if she put on some Tag Body Spray. As long as there's no Mark David Chapman-type stuff in that angle.

Dick Clark/Mariah Carey New Year's Eve Comment

2010-01-18T22:31:00.000-08:00

ORIGINALLY POSTED ON THE EIGHTH EDITION OF "THE BEAU ZONE" ON THE HARD ROCK HEROES WEBSITE FROM MAY TO NOVEMBER 2006.

The ads this past New Year's for Dick Clark's New Year's Rockin' Eve said, "the first ever performance in Times Square" by Mariah Carey. Well, that was the first FOR THAT SHOW, the Dick Clark show. It is NOT the first Times Square NYE TV performance. I believe that honor went to Lindsay Lohan on MTV's Iced Out last year. I'll tell anyone - if I'm wrong and someone can give me info about an earlier performance, please do. Until then, Lindsay Lohan was the first. I will say it was cool seeing Mariah sing live on Dick Clark on ABC, then appear for a cameo on MTV (I can picture her handlers traipsing her across the street from ABC to MTV), then go back again to hang out with Dick's co-host Ryan Seacrest. Doing the MTV cameo was cool for logistics fans like me, but going back across the street to ABC again as well? That was da bomb and groovy!

Michael Jackson Comment

2010-01-18T22:29:00.000-08:00

ORIGINALLY POSTED ON THE EIGHTH EDITION OF "THE BEAU ZONE" ON THE HARD ROCK HEROES WEBSITE FROM MAY TO NOVEMBER 2006.

How about Michael Jackson going into the ladies' washroom in Dubai on the Arabian Gulf. He said he misunderstood the symbol on the door. He must've thought it was Prince's former symbol, and we all think Prince is sort of a man, so he went in. Maybe he wanted to look at "the only man in the mirror" (pretend I'm singing). Sources say he was seen putting on makeup. Oh, so he went there to blend right in!

Judas Priest Comment

2010-01-18T22:28:00.000-08:00

ORIGINALLY POSTED ON THE EIGHTH EDITION OF "THE BEAU ZONE" ON THE HARD ROCK HEROES WEBSITE FROM MAY TO NOVEMBER 2006.

So Rob Halford is back with Judas Priest. Now, his return is since he came out of the closet. So I guess that lends a whole new meaning to ".....be my Turbo Lover....." And if you see them on tour, if there's a smoking ban in the building, make sure when you sneak a smoke when everyone is standing up all around you so you don't get caught, that you do it when they're playing "Breaking The Law!"

Jeff Daniels' Winnipeg Connection

2010-01-18T22:24:00.000-08:00

ORIGINALLY POSTED ON THE EIGHTH EDITION OF "THE BEAU ZONE" ON THE HARD ROCK HEROES WEBSITE FROM MAY TO NOVEMBER 2006.

Actor Jeff Daniels recently shot "The Lookout" here in Winnipeg. I heard he has a prior Winnipeg connection in that he was in another film with born-in-Winnipeg young Oscar-winning actress Anna Pacquin. But Jeff has another quasi-Winnipeg connection: He reprised his "Dumb and Dumber" character in the music video for a song in the movie, Winnipeg's Crash Test Dummies' "The Ballad Of Peter Pumpkinhead," if you recall. Only he did it; Jim Carrey didn't.

The Apprentice/Gillette Comment

2010-01-18T22:23:00.000-08:00

ORIGINALLY POSTED ON THE EIGHTH EDITION OF "THE BEAU ZONE" ON THE HARD ROCK HEROES WEBSITE FROM MAY TO NOVEMBER 2006.

Didn't it seem strange in that episode of The Apprentice a few weeks ago where the teams were selling Gillette Fusion in New York's Times Square that we didn't see any Gillette executives? That's because Gillette is in the process of being purchased by Proctor & Gamble, so they probably didn't want their suits on camera because there was no guarantee the people that would be on camera would still have a job by the time that show was aired. Isn't it ironic, then, that the winning team got to go to that agency and help down-and-out unemployed business people? Hey, maybe that agency will be helping fired former Gillette executives this summer once P & G completes their takeover! Maybe Gillettte execs watched that show and said, "That's where I'll go after P & G fires me!"

Kevin Bacon Comment

2010-01-18T22:22:00.000-08:00

ORIGINALLY POSTED ON THE EIGHTH EDITION OF "THE BEAU ZONE" ON THE HARD ROCK HEROES WEBSITE FROM MAY TO NOVEMBER 2006.

Kevin Bacon appears with Colin Firth, and Rachel Blanchard in a three-way sex scene in the recent movie Where The Truth Lies. Wow. Never mind six degrees of seperation from Kevin Bacon, how about ZERO degrees of seperation from Kevin Bacon?

Donald Trump Comment

2010-01-18T22:21:00.000-08:00

ORIGINALLY POSTED ON THE EIGHTH EDITION OF "THE BEAU ZONE" ON THE HARD ROCK HEROES WEBSITE FROM MAY TO NOVEMBER 2006.

Did you read that report in the paper that said scientists' studies have discovered that the most successful business people suffer from brain damage? I guess that explains Donald Trump's singing of the Green Acres theme song on the Emmy Awards.

The Jessica Simpson/Nick Lachey Breakup

2010-01-18T22:19:00.000-08:00

ORIGINALLY POSTED ON THE EIGHTH EDITION OF "THE BEAU ZONE" ON THE HARD ROCK HEROES WEBSITE FROM MAY TO NOVEMBER 2006.

Regarding the Jessica Simpson/Nick Lachey breakup, I guess her boots really were made for walking! And after they broke up, I was browsing CDs at Wal-Mart and came across 98 Degrees' Christmas Album. One of the songs is "I'll Be Home For Christmas." Well, yeah, Nick, I guess you were home for Christmas this year! At your parents' place! You probably sang that song there, too! I heard on Nick's new solo album there's a picture of him beside his new home, a trailer. Maybe it was a sublet from Julie and Marissa on The O.C.!

The Lousy United States Drinking Age Of 21

2010-01-18T22:17:00.000-08:00

ORIGINALLY POSTED ON THE EIGHTH EDITION OF "THE BEAU ZONE" ON THE HARD ROCK HEROES WEBSITE FROM MAY TO NOVEMBER 2006.

Wow - Five months you people had to wait before seeing a new Beau Zone. That's because I was taking a course in Microsoft Word from January to March. But we're back now! Let's start with this recent stupid crackdown in some United States nightclubs on people, including celebrities, between the ages of 18 and 21 drinking in the clubs. Really, let's talk about the more stupid U.S. drinking age of 21. Like, what's up with that? Here in the province of Manitoba in Canada the drinking age is 18. Which only makes perfect sense, because the legal age of adulthood is 18. In fact, it is in the U.S., too, so with what adulthood and "coming of age" is supposed to represent, let me get this straight: You're a legal, responsible adult at 18.....but you can't drink until you're 21? What's up with that? Why isn't there more outcry about this in the United States? Is it because of all the heavier trafffic and more dangerous freeways generally found in the greater population density of the U.S., and the resulting increased abundance of concern over drinking and driving that comes with it? You know, the same logic car-rental companies use to deny a rental to anyone under 25. What it's actually doing is keeping people in adolescence longer, which can be a good thing in the clubs, malls, and hip clothing and record stores, but can also be a bad thing if you're looking for a good doctor or skilled tradespeople. Ashlee Simpson drunk at a McDonald's in Toronto, ON here in Canada caused people to say, "She's just being 21." I sneer at that. 21 - yeah, right. She's just being 18 here in Manitoba. In fact, some people who aren't naturally party people will experiment with drinking alcohol at 18 when they become an adult here in Manitoba, they'll do their rites of passage like puking at parties, etc., and they'll have it all out of their system by the ripe old age of 21, THREE YEARS LATER. Then they can get to the business at hand of getting their degree. And their approach to booze and partying becomes more mature. The girls may still want to wear hip jeans or dress like sluts, and get drunk on the weekend from time to time, but it's at a more adult level. Americans, through their backward drinking age of 21, are more like grade 12 teenagers when they turn 21 and can then legally drink. Of course, as I turn this discussion upside down now, this argument doesn't apply to those people that are destined to stay terminal adolescents for the rest of their lives. Those who always party at a level somewhere between the two levels I describe above. Like me and Hollywood celebrities! Hey, if anyone can get this message to celebrities between 18 and 21 that like to party like Linday Lohan or Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen - Hey, girls, guess what, the drinking age here in Manitoba, Canada is 18!! Here, YOU'RE LEGAL!!! Maybe you can find a movie to star in that shoots here in Winnipeg, MB. Then at night you can hit the clubs and party the night away! Fuck the Red Bull - you can drink Smirnoff Ice or Bacardi or beer or whatever BOOZE your hearts desire! Most of the bigger and more sophisticated clubs have specially-built outdoor smoking compounds, too, as unfortunately, we now have a lousy stinking smoking ban in bars here, too. (Maybe someday I'll write about that here on The Beau Zone.) Getting back to the drinking age, I believe in every province in Canada it's either 18 or 19. In Ontario it's 19. Party on, girls! And don't forget to bring your hottest micro-minis and stilettos!

Pro Wrestling Comments

2010-01-16T03:54:00.000-08:00

ORIGINALLY POSTED ON THE SEVENTH EDITION OF "THE BEAU ZONE" ON THE HARD ROCK HEROES WEBSITE FROM DECEMBER 2005 TO MAY 2006.

This section continues to feature old comments, as I had numerous funny ones that I didn't have room for in previous Beau Zones, plus I have little in the way of new comments, and/or no time to write any new thoughts on wrestling I may have.

Remember when Molly Holly tried wrestling with a wig on? Now she knows why Golddust took off his wig before he started wrestling his match.

So Mordecai comes out on Smackdown and calls all Toronto women harlots, including mothers, daughters, wives, girlfriends, etc. Then Chavo Classic is surrounded by older Toronto hot babes. Hey, looks like Mordecai was right! (Yeah, I know Classic paid those women off, but that's what my comment was when watching before Classic paid the women off.)

JBL should cut a promo saying "Let me get this straight, CNBC cuts me because I'm too controversial, but they hire John McEnroe to do a talk show?"

Ever wonder if previous Raw General Manager Eric Bischoff's sister watches Raw? And what she thought of what her brother has done to poor Eugene? Wonder if she responded. She sure never showed up at Raw with backup to counter Bischoff!

How about where Maria interviews Shawn Michaels about his match with "The Edge." Maybe she thought he was wrestling The Edge from the band U2. Maybe at the next PPV they can have that match. They could even have Bono vs. Paul Martin as the main event on that card, since Bono is pissed off with Paul Martin right now. Hey, and in Paul Martin's corner, now he could have Belinda Stronach!

How about Raw on August 29, with Alter Bridge cheering on Edge: Aren't they a psuedo-Christian band? In a heel's corner? Or was that just when those guys were with Scott Stapp as Creed? Hey, maybe Scott Stapp should have been in Matt Hardy's corner!

Britney & Kevin Comment

2010-01-16T03:52:00.000-08:00

ORIGINALLY POSTED ON THE SEVENTH EDITION OF "THE BEAU ZONE" ON THE HARD ROCK HEROES WEBSITE FROM DECEMBER 2005 TO MAY 2006.

Before Britney & Kevin's son was born, I thought that Britney should divorce Kevin and call her kid Billy.....get it? Billy Spears? Any Beatles fans out there? Then Billy will sing, "What would you think if my mom sang out of tune? Would you stand up and walk out on her?".....Oh, wait a sec. Aw, darn, that's Billy SHEARS, not Billy Spears. Hey, that was ALMOST funny!

Justin Timberlake Puking Comment

2010-01-16T03:51:00.000-08:00

ORIGINALLY POSTED ON THE SEVENTH EDITION OF "THE BEAU ZONE" ON THE HARD ROCK HEROES WEBSITE FROM DECEMBER 2005 TO MAY 2006.

Apparently Justin Timberlake puked on a floor in a restaurant when he couldn't get to the bathroom in time. Maybe he had just ate one of those Kit Kat Banana bars. Then I heard the restaurant's employees were considering offering the vomit for sale on E-bay. Hey, if they sold it, then maybe they could arrange to ship it to the buyer via Puke-o-lator!!!!!

Rachel, Ryan, and Alanis Comment

2010-01-16T03:49:00.000-08:00

ORIGINALLY POSTED ON THE SEVENTH EDITION OF "THE BEAU ZONE" ON THE HARD ROCK HEROES WEBSITE FROM DECEMBER 2005 TO MAY 2006.

I saw the Teen Choice Awards and saw Rachel McAdams giving Ryan Reynolds a big smooch. Don't know if she really was into him, but aren't he and Alanis almost married? Hey, maybe Alanis got mad at that and when he came home she said to him, "Did she go down on you in a theatre?" Or hey, maybe Alanis, Rachel, and Ryan can all get together for a new show called "Two girls, a guy, and a pizza place!"

Steven Tyler "Be Cool" Mistake Spoken By Steven Himself!?!?

2010-01-16T03:46:00.000-08:00

ORIGINALLY POSTED ON THE SEVENTH EDITION OF "THE BEAU ZONE" ON THE HARD ROCK HEROES WEBSITE FROM DECEMBER 2005 TO MAY 2006.

In the scene in the Get Shorty sequel, Be Cool, where John Travolta and Uma Thurman are convincing Steven Tyler that he was thinking about his daughters Mia and Liv (names mentioned) when he wrote the song Sweet Emotion, Steven responds, "Yeah, but they were just kids then." Wait a sec - they weren't even born then! He would have co-wrote Sweet Emotion around 1973 or so, as it was on the Aerosmith album Toys In The Attic that was released in either 1974 or 1975. According to Google, Liv Tyler was born July 1, 1977, and Mia Tyler was born December 22, 1978. Steven Tyler even thought Todd Rundgren was Liv's father until well into the '80s. So why did Steven Tyler agree to utter that line of dialogue in the film? I have no idea! (Anyone know?)

Elton John Wedding Comment

2010-01-16T03:45:00.001-08:00

ORIGINALLY POSTED ON THE SEVENTH EDITION OF "THE BEAU ZONE" ON THE HARD ROCK HEROES WEBSITE FROM DECEMBER 2005 TO MAY 2006.

So Elton John got married to another man right before Christmas. I wonder if anyone at the wedding sang, ".....don we now our gay apparel.....?"

That '70s Show Stuff

2010-01-16T03:43:00.000-08:00

ORIGINALLY POSTED ON THE SEVENTH EDITION OF "THE BEAU ZONE" ON THE HARD ROCK HEROES WEBSITE FROM DECEMBER 2005 TO MAY 2006.

When I heard that Ashton Kutcher had wrapped up filming his last episode of That '70s Show, I thought, "Huh? I knew he was supposed to be in four episodes this season, but I assumed they would be spread throughout the season, kind of like John Travolta's deal when he first stopped being a regular on Welcome Back Kotter. It's just that I think I've also heard this will be the last season for That '70s Show, so wouldn't it make sense for one of those four appearances to be the last episode? Where, also, perhaps Eric comes home from Africa and Topher Grace also comes back for the final episode? (Eric might as well come back permanently if the show's going off the air.) They couldn't have pre-filmed that episode - it would have been all over the gossip mags and the web for sure. A head scratcher. (They could also finally go into 1980 on that last episode, too.)" But since I had those thoughts, those four episodes have aired. Oh, okay, I see - the last of those four with Bruce Willis, was the plotline to take him out of the show. So for a last episode.....no Kelso? No Kelso AND Eric? Or was "Ashton Kutcher in only four episodes" not to be taken that literally? Not that it was meant to be a lie, maybe they just didn't want to take away from what a last episode could be.....or maybe they just don't know yet. We'll have to wait and see, I guess. And as per my previous Beau Zone discussions, boy, they've sure been stuck in 1979 for a very long time now. This season, though, do you notice the year sticker at the bottom right hand corner of the license plate, instead of going up a year to read "80," is instead, GONE! Hmmmm.....

Hilary Duff New Year's Eve Stuff (Hey, that rhymes!)

2010-01-16T03:40:00.000-08:00

ORIGINALLY POSTED ON THE SEVENTH EDITION OF "THE BEAU ZONE" ON THE HARD ROCK HEROES WEBSITE FROM DECEMBER 2005 TO MAY 2006.

In a recent edition of Us Weekly, Joel Madden said Hilary Duff wants a sewing machine for Christmas. Now that that's out there, by the time Christmas arrives, is Hilary going to think her request is "Sew Yesterday, Sew Yesterday?" (GET IT?) I wonder if any of her fans reading that will send her sewing machines the way Eva Longoria's fans sent her vibrators. I hope anyone in the first few rows at all the shows on her upcoming post-Christmas concert tour holds up signs saying, "Hilary, did you get your sewing machine for Xmas?" And, hey, now that Hilary's hosting the L.A. portion of Dick Clark's New Year's Rockin' Eve, Dick and Ryan Seacrest live in Times Square can ask her if she got her sewing machine for Christmas! And she can answer "Ah,....yeah! Ha Ha!" with a cornball, kind of flustered/embarassed look on her face, because her portion of that show will have been taped before Christmas!

Kevin Donnelly's Good Charlotte/Simple Plan Winnipeg Concert Fiasco Response

2010-01-16T03:35:00.000-08:00

ORIGINALLY POSTED ON THE SEVENTH EDITION OF "THE BEAU ZONE" ON THE HARD ROCK HEROES WEBSITE FROM DECEMBER 2005 TO MAY 2006.

Well, it took a while due to other commitments, but finally here's a new Beau Zone. One of those commitments was finding you people an explanation for the Good Charlotte/Simple Plan fiasco I opened The Beau Zone with last column. Briefly, just after the Good Charlotte/Simple Plan show was moved from The Burton Cummings Theatre to the MTS Centre this past summer, Simple Plan mysteriously dropped out. Why? My e-mails to Simple Plan bounced back, saying their inbox was full. My e-mails to Winnipeg newspaper music writers were not answered. I didn't know who the promotor was. But Kevin Donnelly, Senior Vice-President of Event Management and Building Operations for True North, which runs the MTS Centre, did respond. Now, I never saw ALL the news or advertising on this bill, which makes his response to this issue both interesting and puzzling. Was this tour only for the U.S.? Following is the response from Kevin Donnelly, Senior Vice-President of Event Management and Building Operations for True North, which runs the MTS Centre:

"I hate to break it to you, but there are no 'conspiracies' secretly held in the Winnipeg concert promoting world - no shady ties between writers and bookers and venues in an attempt to fool the public. As I recall it - and please understand I am only the venue here - I responded to a call from the promoter who was interested in moving a sold out show from Venue A (The Burt) to Venue B (MTS Centre). Simple Plan were never on the bill for the show at The Burt. They were touring together as a package in the U.S., but the package was never promoted anywhere in Canada to my knowledge. They were never mentioned in any conversations I had with the event promoter. Radio station employees (and the newspaper writers for that matter) routinely pick up info from one source and assume it is accurate - even if it is not the source they know provides the correct information for their town. Speaking from experience (I used to be a concert promoter), radio jocks and writers used to announce concerts based on info from magazines and from record companies - even if the promoter (the only one who would be 100% accurate, because they are the one creating the show) was telling them otherwise. This regularly leads to the announcing of wrong dates (happens all the time), wrong venues (Bartley Kives announced Barenaked Ladies for the Concert Hall), and sometimes even wrong performers on the bill. I don’t doubt that you may have heard SP with GC on the radio somewhere, but in reality I don’t think the show was ever booked that way for Winnipeg. Blame the lazy disc jockey who watched E Talk Daily about the tour in the U.S. and assumed the package was coming here. Sorry to disappoint. Not second shooter on the grassy knoll… - Kevin"

So there you have it. I have found tour dates on the web supporting what Kevin says, although I don't know when those pages were posted. I also tried e-mailing Remo at Hot 103, 'cause that's the station that kept saying "Good Charlotte and Simple Plan are coming" that let to the Burt selling out in five minutes in the first place, since, as you recall, I turned on the radio that night in June just as Remo's interview with someone in Simple Plan had ended and Remo had said, ".....and that's why Simple Plan won't be opening for Good Charlotte at the show's new venue, MTS Centre, now." Remo did respond to me, saying he doesn't remember any of it and that it could have been one of the other jocks. Yeah, right. I have found a great SP fan website as I write this, one that acknowledges much of the facts you have just read. I'll try asking the girl who runs it about all of this. If she has any substantial answer, I'll put it on the NEXT Beau Zone, otherwise that is all for this topic.

Pro Wrestling Comments

2010-01-07T14:09:00.000-08:00

ORIGINALLY POSTED ON THE SIXTH EDITION OF "THE BEAU ZONE" ON THE HARD ROCK HEROES WEBSITE FROM AUGUST TO DECEMBER 2005.

How about MNM? Aren't they THE HOTTEST TAG TEAM EVER? Melina reminds me of J.Lo - In fact, Josh Matthews should ask her if Nitro & Mercury are wearing real fur, and she should angrily blurt out, "Of course they're wearing real fur, you moron!" That's in regard to J.Lo and the PETA controversy with her perhaps wearing real fur. It's about time someone started name-dropping celebrities again! I haven't heard that on a regular basis since Jesse Ventura in the 70s said stuff like, "Mean Gene, what do you think of these sunglasses Cheryl Ladd gave me?" I can hardly wait to party with Melina and the boys at Rain at The Palms or the Hard Rock Hotel in Vegas with Ashton, Paris, Nicole, Nick & Jessica, Britney & Kevin, etc.

Re: Viscera & Trish's dinner date: Maybe he should've been wearing that Tag body spray. (If anyone doesn't get that, Trish is the spokesperson in Canada for Tag Body Spray.)

Did you see Punk'd with Goldberg where the stunt backfired and the semi didn't run over his motorcycle? I wonder if Ashton Kutcher remarked to Goldberg, "I guess you're used to this kind of stuff from WCW, huh?"

This is an old comment but I wanted to use it so here goes: Remember when Heidenreich was still a heel and had to wear a straight jacket? So, at that time, lemme get this straight: With WWE's new dress code, if I ran into him at an airport, not only does he have to wear a dress shirt and dress pants, but over it he now also has to wear a straight jacket, too? Hey, how about NOW with the Road Warrior gimmick? Hey, maybe WWE will make him and Animal wear dress shirts and dress pants along with their makeup and those spiked shoulder pads! Wouldn't that be a look? Animal wearing any shirt over his gut would be an improvement, though.

Las Vegas (The TV Show) Stuff

2010-01-07T14:07:00.000-08:00

ORIGINALLY POSTED ON THE SIXTH EDITION OF "THE BEAU ZONE" ON THE HARD ROCK HEROES WEBSITE FROM AUGUST TO DECEMBER 2005.

How about that woman who walked out on her wedding and went to Las Vegas? Hey, that would be a great plot for the TV show Las Vegas! Picture the beginning of the show - Samantha, Delinda, Mary, and Nessa are walking around the casino at the Montecito laughing and talking when they hear a woman sitting at one of the slot machines crying. They ask her what's the matter. She says, "I just walked out of my wedding!" They look at each other, concerned. And for the rest of the hour they help her with her problems! It'll be great! Just don't let Jon Lovitz get involved!

Winnipeg Nightclub & Nightlife Stuff

2010-01-07T14:06:00.000-08:00

ORIGINALLY POSTED ON THE SIXTH EDITION OF "THE BEAU ZONE" ON THE HARD ROCK HEROES WEBSITE FROM AUGUST TO DECEMBER 2005.

Anyone notice that girls have been showing their midriffs in nightclubs for years now, just as those nightclubs are now only playing slow songs at the end of the night. (They used to play a slow song set two or three times a night.) What's up with that?

Juno Awards Stuff

2010-01-07T14:03:00.000-08:00

ORIGINALLY POSTED ON THE SIXTH EDITION OF "THE BEAU ZONE" ON THE HARD ROCK HEROES WEBSITE FROM AUGUST TO DECEMBER 2005.

The Juno Awards were held in Winnipeg this past April. I have lots of comments about that:

Before the show, I had heard an announcement would be forthcoming from CARAS concerning previously-announced Juno Award performers and presenters that would now be dropping out of the awards show as they had just realized the Junos are being held the same night as Wrestlemania 21. Some of these celebrities were thinking of coming to Winnipeg anyway and just watch it at The O.C. (formerly The Beach, formerly Scandals, formerly Haggar's) at the Norlander Inn with Joe & Cyrus. Yes, I'm kidding around, although if that did happen, I wonder what matches they would have chosen to miss when it's time to spend a few minutes in the outdoor smoking compound, unless they had TVs set up out there. And there's no truth to the rumor that Neil Young was at first denied access to watch the Junos at the Canadian consulate in New York because Pamela Wallin's staff wanted to watch Wrestlemania 21, either. I wonder if Neil wanted to see W21, though? Now, how about Chantal Kreviazuk? Cancelled her appearance due to pregnancy? A likely story. She just wanted to see W21! Maybe she wanted to cheer on her fellow Winnipeg hometown hero Chris Jericho.

On a more serious note, since I couldn't get around to this comment at the time of Northern Lights, Northern Stars, the opening show at our new arena, the MTS Centre, here it is now as it pertains to the Junos: I predicted someone will say to Burton Cummings or Randy Bachman that night, "I bought your first record/I bought my first record by you right here in this building when it was Eaton's!"

And too bad Bryan Adams didn't come. When/if he does show up at MTS Centre to perform, where the stage is located is pretty damn close to where A & A Records was at Eaton Place when he did an autograph signing there when he was in Winnipeg opening for Loverboy at Winnipeg Arena in 1982. Wonder if he'd remember. I got his autograph on his "Lonely Nights" picture single. There were about 15 people in line, I think. Wow. I asked him if he'd do "Let Me Take You Dancing," a Saints Roller Rink fave. I didn't think he would but I thought I might hear an interesting story about that oddball disco song with chipmunk vocals that came out before his first album did and has never been on any album. Instead, he just said, "No." Oh, okay. Man of few words, I guess.

Kathy Hilton/Jay Leno/Eric Bischoff Stuff

2010-01-07T13:59:00.000-08:00

ORIGINALLY POSTED ON THE SIXTH EDITION OF "THE BEAU ZONE" ON THE HARD ROCK HEROES WEBSITE FROM AUGUST TO DECEMBER 2005.

Forgive me for this not being in the "Pro Wrestling" section in case you don't get this..... A recent edition of The National Enquirer reported that Kathy Hilton and her daughter Paris Hilton almost had a fight causing Paris not to appear on The Tonight Show with her mother recently. They made up, however, when Jay Leno reportedly wouldn't have Kathy Hilton on by herself. Well, of course not! Kathy Hilton's appearance was to plug her new show, I Want To Be A Hilton (which rocks, by the way - and Jules is hot). That's the show WWE Raw General Manager Eric Bischoff revealed to Joe Aiello in his famous No Holds Barred interview on CITI FM here in Winnipeg last year that he and his partner Jason Hervey had sold to NBC. THE SAME ERIC BISCHOFF that, with Hulk Hogan, as the NWO a few years ago, tried to take over The Tonight Show from Jay Leno! Remember that? Jay had to go get Diamond Dallas Page and two cops to take Hogan and Bischoff out! Of course Jay isn't going to play ball with Eric! HA HA HA HA HA!!!!!

That '70s Show Stuff

2010-01-07T13:58:00.000-08:00

ORIGINALLY POSTED ON THE SIXTH EDITION OF "THE BEAU ZONE" ON THE HARD ROCK HEROES WEBSITE FROM AUGUST TO DECEMBER 2005.

This is becoming a regular Beau Zone feature! Well, now I know That '70s Show is totally screwed. Remember when they did the talking yearbook photos gag two seasons ago? It showed "1978" at the top of the yearbook page and the gang had one year of high school left at that point. So the next year they graduate high school, except for Jackie, who, remember, is one grade behind. I think we found that out during the first season of the show. So it must be 1979 at that point, right? Now it's a year later, and over the course of the past year they did that episode where the gang goes back to high school for Jackie's dance. Okay, makes sense. Most recently, on another episode, the show starts off with the gang all walking into Eric's basement and Jackie's wearing a grad cap. she takes it off and proclaims, "Boy, am I glad to have finished high school." So that means it now must be THE SUMMER OF 1980!!!!! But it's not, of course: in the show they're still in the '70s, even though it's now two years past the summer of 1978. How does that make any sense?

Good Charlotte/Simple Plan Winnipeg Concert Fiasco

2010-01-07T13:55:00.000-08:00

ORIGINALLY POSTED ON THE SIXTH EDITION OF "THE BEAU ZONE" ON THE HARD ROCK HEROES WEBSITE FROM AUGUST TO DECEMBER 2005.

Does anyone know why Simple Plan bailed out of their gig with Good Charlotte here in Winnipeg, MB? It was kind of a fiasco, as they were originally booked into the 2000-seat Burton Cummings Theatre that sold out in five minutes, then the show was moved to our arena, the MTS Centre, THEN Simple Plan is mysteriously off the show! Hey, it's in an arena and it sold out the theatre because it's "Good Charlotte & Simple Plan," NOT Good Charlotte and two no-name bands that ended up opening for them. I actually heard a bit of talk on this on the radio but not enough. As I awoke from a nap, I heard Remo on Hot 103 saying, ".....and that's why Simple Plan isn't opening for Good Charlotte anymore." I thought I'd read about it in our two daily newspapers but they both mysteriously ignored it! What's the dirt on this? What's the conspiracy? Good thing I didn't buy a ticket! I was going to buy one when the show first moved to the MTS Centre but couldn't get around to it for a couple of days and I'm glad because it was after those two days that I almost heard Remo as I describe above. Good thing I didn't immediately do it! Wow, what a bait-and-switch this appears to be! Maybe some party didn't want the Winnipeg media "putting ideas into fans' heads" of potentially asking for refunds because Simple Plan cancelled. Maybe promoters or someone's management wanted the Winnipeg fans to forget Simple Plan were ever on this bill. The promoters should have moved it back to the theatre once they found out Simple Plan was dropping out. So does anyone know why Simple Plan dropped out?

Pro Wrestling Comments

2010-01-07T13:44:00.000-08:00

ORIGINALLY POSTED ON THE FIFTH EDITION OF "THE BEAU ZONE" ON THE HARD ROCK HEROES WEBSITE FROM APRIL TO AUGUST 2005.

Remember the Breakaway Club at the Polo Park Inn, when the wrestlers would go there to hang out after the card? They're just in the room, among the fans. None of this Sunfest/CITI FM VIP area crap. (God, I HATED seeing that VIP room with a roof, places to sit and fridges right there in front at Sunfest, just flaunting it right in front of the PAYING fans who have to put up with the elements - I hope that stupid VIP area was why Sunfest died - a VIP area should be ten miles from the stage so that anyone in it needs binoculars to see the band - give the PAYING FANS the damn benches, fridges, and a roof over their head. If I was invited in the VIP area during the Hard Rock Heroes years, I would have checked it out, but probably not stayed there long, as I would have been embarrased to be in there.) So when Chris Jericho's band Fozzy came to town that first time at The Colesseum in December 2003 and Joe Aiello on CITI FM's No Holds Barred said WWE wrestlers might be at the gig because it took place after that night's WWE card, I truly, sincerly thought it would be a throwback to the Breakaway Club days with the wrestlers just in the bar among the people. I never dreamed in my wildest dreams they would be sequestered into a damn upstairs VIP area. I sure felt like a peon that night, little old me, JUST A PAYING FAN. So what would it take to bring back the days of the Breakaway Club? And just where DO the wrestlers go after the card now? Is it really like the article in the WWE Mag that said Kane reads Shakespeare novels after the card, etc., and no one goes to bars anymore? I wondered to myself if the wrestlers would be going to the Tijuana Yacht Club when that place first opened, but when I went there after the first applicable WWE card, no wrestlers showed up. So where are they? DO they just go out in public anymore like they used to at the Breakaway Club? Or are they just too big for that now? And I don't mean that sarcasticly - ARE WWE superstars more like Elvis and Britney now, that they would get really hounded in public, moreso than they ever did at the Breakaway Club? I e-mailed Cyrus at the time that Fozzy gig happened to tell him maybe this would make a good future subject for his Winnipeg Sun column, but alas, he never approached it, and now he doesn't do a column anymore.

Speaking of Cyrus, I had been drooling at the thought of upcoming stories in the Stanley Weston wrestling mags on Don Callis taking control of TNA (a cover story with Don on the cover, perhaps?), but alas, I guess that happened, along with Don suddenly quitting the company a bit later, in such a time period that allowed all of that to occur between issues. I had been hoping Don's taking control of TNA would be right before their deadline, hence all the cover stories. Since that wasn't the case, the info was just buried in their news tidbits with the addition that Don had left the company for "a full-time job in his hometown." Oh, well.

So if Lita's baby really was Kane's, but Matt Hardy had won that night's match on Raw, would the baby have been (or still have been) named Matt Hardy, Version 2?

I guess a couple of weeks after it happened, JBL got one of those photo radar tickets in the mail from Eddie Guerrero driving his limo. If that had happened here for our Smackdown taping, would he have gotten Bob Holliday to pay the ticket?

Winnipeg Nightclub & Nightlife Stuff

2010-01-07T13:42:00.000-08:00

ORIGINALLY POSTED ON THE FIFTH EDITION OF "THE BEAU ZONE" ON THE HARD ROCK HEROES WEBSITE FROM APRIL TO AUGUST 2005.

How about this for a good name for a nightclub: "Aisle 18." Why? Two reasons: 1) The drinking age here in Manitoba is 18. 2) At a pharmaceutical wholesaler I am acquainted with, a lot of the birth-control pills are kept in Aisle 18. Birth-control pills and nightclubs: now there's synergy!

Rock And Roll

2010-01-07T13:40:00.000-08:00

ORIGINALLY POSTED ON THE FIFTH EDITION OF "THE BEAU ZONE" ON THE HARD ROCK HEROES WEBSITE FROM APRIL TO AUGUST 2005.

I heard someone paid $1500.00 for a pair of Bryan Adams' unwashed socks he left in a car he was changing in. I wonder how those socks smell. I'll bet they.....cut like a knife!!!!

An Idea Regarding Winnipeg Arena Memories

2010-01-07T13:38:00.000-08:00

ORIGINALLY POSTED ON THE FIFTH EDITION OF "THE BEAU ZONE" ON THE HARD ROCK HEROES WEBSITE FROM APRIL TO AUGUST 2005.

One of the last Winnipeg Arena concerts was Sarah McLachlan. I didn't go. I wonder if she dedicated "I Will Remember You" to the old barn. It would have been fitting. Actually, at the time I originally thought of this comment I thought that would be the last concert/touring show there, until Van Halen became the last touring show, plus Power 97 scheduled their 8-ball show there a few days ahead of Van Halen with The Trews and all those other bands.

Another Apprentice Comment

2010-01-07T13:37:00.000-08:00

ORIGINALLY POSTED ON THE FIFTH EDITION OF "THE BEAU ZONE" ON THE HARD ROCK HEROES WEBSITE FROM APRIL TO AUGUST 2005.

Hey, instead of designing a new Pepsi bottle, how about if the teams on The Apprentice had designed the bottle for that new Trump cologne? What's the matter, Don, baby, wouldn't you allow your candidates a plumb opportunity like that?

Jay Leno/Michael Jackson Comment

2010-01-07T13:36:00.000-08:00

ORIGINALLY POSTED ON THE FIFTH EDITION OF "THE BEAU ZONE" ON THE HARD ROCK HEROES WEBSITE FROM APRIL TO AUGUST 2005.

Gee, and for a minute there I was considering calling my buddy Jay Leno up and asking him if he needed me to go on The Tonight Show some night to tell his Michael Jackson jokes.

Paris Hilton Cellphone Comment

2010-01-07T13:34:00.000-08:00

ORIGINALLY POSTED ON THE FIFTH EDITION OF "THE BEAU ZONE" ON THE HARD ROCK HEROES WEBSITE FROM APRIL TO AUGUST 2005.

Damn that Paris Hilton.....now I had to change my cellphone number.

That '70s Show Stuff

2010-01-07T13:31:00.000-08:00

ORIGINALLY POSTED ON THE FIFTH EDITION OF "THE BEAU ZONE" ON THE HARD ROCK HEROES WEBSITE FROM APRIL TO AUGUST 2005.

Did you see that That '70s Show where Kelso gives Fez a box of Playboys? The guys realize later on in the episode they've left Fez alone in Eric's basement with them, so they rush to check him out. They find him passed out on the couch, covered in Playboys. Good thing I was watching this on tape - I thought to myself, "Hey, that one over his leg looks familiar - is that the one with former late-period Charlie's Angel Tanya Roberts on the cover, who also did a nude pictorial?" I rewound the tape and took a closer look and no, it wasn't. If it was, that would have been a good inside joke, as Tanya Roberts is now, of course, Donna's mother on That '70s Show. Then I went to my own copy of that issue to check the date, and it turns out it was a 1982 issue. So they couldn't have used it on That '70s Show. They're still in 1979 right now.

Also, how about having the gang in a department store in the TV section changing the channel of every TV to a different station? I loved doing this in the '70s when I was a teenager. Of course, now you can't do this because every store has the TV sets either programmed from a main source elsewhere that customers like me can't touch (awww!!) and therefore are playing the same channel on every set, or are playing a DVD on every set. Boring. I'm glad I grew up in the '70s and not now! Of course, the show's producers would have to get the rights for all the shows they put on those sets, I suppose. But if they could, it would certainly be a lot of fun to see the gang in a TV store on, say, Tuesday night after 8:00 p.m. EST seeing Happy Days on one channel and whatever was opposite it in 1979 on another channel.

The Apprentice's Dove Body Wash Commercial

2010-01-07T13:27:00.000-08:00

ORIGINALLY POSTED ON THE FIFTH EDITION OF "THE BEAU ZONE" ON THE HARD ROCK HEROES WEBSITE FROM APRIL TO AUGUST 2005.

How about that episode of The Apprentice where the teams had to make TV commericals for that new Dove body wash? Did you see the one with the girl stroking the guy's cucumber? That was a great commercial!! Donald Trump and the Dove guy don't know what they're talking about. What Unilever, who makes Dove, should do is air that commercial in nightclubs. They'd get a great response there.

But better yet, here's my idea for how that commercial should have gone: It starts out the same way, in the kitchen with the male and female co-workers and the gal stroking his cucumber. Then it cuts to him standing at a table at a nightclub. She comes over and they exchange glances as she pauses, then walks away with his eyes following her. As she paused to look at him, you could see the Dove body wash sticking out of her purse. Cornball, but in a good way, of course. Then it cuts to a shot of the two of them in the shower using the Dove body wash on each other. For good measure, cut to their feet, where she's still wearing her stilettos. All of this with the appropriate narration, of course. Now how's THAT for a TV commercial? Are you listening, Unilever?

Pro Wrestling Comments

2009-12-19T16:03:00.000-08:00

ORIGINALLY POSTED ON THE FOURTH EDITION OF "THE BEAU ZONE" ON THE HARD ROCK HEROES WEBSITE FROM DECEMBER 2004 TO APRIL 2005.

I heard that the Kane vs. Gene Snitsky match at our next WWE card in January 2005, the first one at the MTS Centre, will be a pinfalls count anywhere in the building match. I guess the referee will have to stop them from wrestling into the skywalks, into either Portage Place or Cityplace, 'cause once they go into those skywalks, they're not in the building anymore. If they did wrestle through the skywalks into Portage Place and the food court, I guess it would look like just another day at Portage Place. Maybe the Indian Posse and the Manitoba Warriors can join in the fun.

Let's go back to July when Raw and Smackdown were both held at Winnipeg Arena for two days in a row. My thoughts at the time were: Maybe Chris Jericho can wrestle someone into Polo Park while it's still open before 9:30 p.m. at the July 5 Raw at the arena. Remember that WCW PPV where he and his opponent (forgot who) wrestled across the street and into an office building? Gee, not many office buildings are open Sunday nights, either. Better yet, If Chris wrestles someone into Polo Park, WWE shouldn't tell anyone at Polo Park, they should just go ahead and do it. It'll be a battle royal of Polo Park security guards vs. Winnipeg Arena security guards! Geez, the arena guards will actually get cheered for the first time in their lives! And all live on Spike TV and TSN!!! Here's also what should have happened: Remember how Chris did a Fozzy gig at Cowboys after Raw was over? How about if Christian and Trish Stratus sneak attack Chris onstage at the Fozzy gig and WWE cameras capture it? Travis Tomko will still be backstage as Tony Condello will be asking him if he's related to Al Tomko. Then Christian and Trish can lay out the rest of the band and security guards as they try to make the save and sing their own songs on stage for a while. The smart marks in the crowd would be furiously typing e-mails to Dave Meltzer on their cell phones. It would have been tremendous.

Remember when Eric Bischoff told William Regal on Raw if he doesn't look after Eugene he'll "never work in this business again?" Not just WWE, but the entire business. Joe Aiello said he was scheduled to tape an interview with Bischoff the following Wednesday - the famous NHB interview Bischoff did. Hey, Joe should have told Bischoff if it happens that Regal is dismissed from WWE that he & Cyrus have every intention of booking him for a NHB show whether Bischoff likes it or not and see what he says.

Regarding Big Show throwing Kurt Angle off that platform: Someone should tell Big Show that just because Hulk Hogan can throw him off the roof of Cobo Hall and he can survive doesn't mean Kurt Angle can survive anything similiar, too.

Rock And Roll (Sort Of)

2009-12-19T16:02:00.000-08:00

ORIGINALLY POSTED ON THE FOURTH EDITION OF "THE BEAU ZONE" ON THE HARD ROCK HEROES WEBSITE FROM DECEMBER 2004 TO APRIL 2005.

Hilary Duff in January at the MTS Centre.....Wonder if she'll tell us the Winnipeg Arena is "so yesterday, so yesterday.....?"

Las Vegas Nightclub & Nightlife Stuff

2009-12-19T15:58:00.000-08:00

ORIGINALLY POSTED ON THE FOURTH EDITION OF "THE BEAU ZONE" ON THE HARD ROCK HEROES WEBSITE FROM DECEMBER 2004 TO APRIL 2005.

According to a recent Us Magazine report, The Alladin Hotel in Vegas will be opening a Club Paris nightclub in 2005 after Paris Hilton, as part of their new Planet Hollywood Casino. Hey, how about this for the ad campaign: "Now, you too can spend a night in Paris....." Get it?

Television

2009-12-19T15:54:00.000-08:00

ORIGINALLY POSTED ON THE FOURTH EDITION OF "THE BEAU ZONE" ON THE HARD ROCK HEROES WEBSITE FROM DECEMBER 2004 TO APRIL 2005.

Can casting be both eerie and cornball at the same time? On Hope And Faith, we've seen two flashbacks now to when Hope & Faith's mother was still alive and she's played by Cheryl Ladd. In the present day, their father, played by Robert Wagner, is going out with Hope's gynocologist played by Jaclyn Smith. Both Charlie's Angels from the 70s TV show!!! So we can never see a scene with both of them in it meeting each other where one of them says, "You look familiar. Don't I know you from somewhere?" Unless Hope & Faith bring their mother back from the dead in a seance or something. On top of all that, Cheryl Ladd also plays James Caan's wife on Las Vegas now, and she's with former Beverly Hills 90210-er Vanessa Marcil there. Well, on one of her Hope And Faith flashback appearances, she's there with fellow 90210-er Brian Austin Green, playing himself, as the flashback takes place when 90210 was still on the air! And going back to Las Vegas, even Lindsay Price stopped by Las Vegas for a guest shot working with her fellow former 90210 castmate Marcil a few weeks ago for a late period 90210 reunion! Talk about boggling the mind on so many levels! EYE-YEYE-YEYE-YEYE-YEYE!!!!!!

Hey, here's a task Donald Trump should have given to his candidates on The Apprentice: Develop a winning restaurant in the middle of Winnipeg's new Provencher Bridge! Think they can do it? Maybe Kwame can sign autographs there, too.

I thought it was hilarious in a different way on Newlyweds when Jessica Simpson and Nick Lachey were talking about Sting and his wife being advocates of tantric sex and she said, "Sting, the singer?" and the way the moment was presented to us on air, we were supposed to think it was another "dumb blonde" moment for Jessica. Hey, that was a legitimate query! Nick could have been talking about Sting, the wrestler!

Danny Bonaduce And Me In Las Vegas

2009-12-19T15:51:00.000-08:00

ORIGINALLY POSTED ON THE FOURTH EDITION OF "THE BEAU ZONE" ON THE HARD ROCK HEROES WEBSITE FROM DECEMBER 2004 TO APRIL 2005.

Here's a scoop:

I was on vacation in Las Vegas the first week of October when the marquee at the Palms Hotel & Casino advertised a one hour comedy TV taping tomorrow (Friday, October 8) at 7:30 p.m. in their lounge with free admission to see none other than Danny Bonaduce of Partridge Family fame.

So I went, and it turned out to be a taping of stand-up comedy to somehow be inserted into a new VH1 reality show starring Danny.

As both the host and Danny himself said, though, Danny's not a stand-up comedian. What he did was a talk in stand-up comedian form about things that have happened in his life. Two stand-up comedians opened for him. The host was a guy who works with Danny on his current morning radio show.

Danny was hilarious. It was the highlight of my trip. Never did I think when I was 10 years old watching The Partridge Family on ABC in 1972 would I someday be in the same room as Danny Partridge, LIVE. Even if I had to wait over 30 years for that moment to occur.

Afterward, the camera crew shot Danny walking around the casino. I walked around behind him, so look for me: I'm wearing a blue New York t-shirt and jeans. Danny rocks! Now let's wait for the air date!

Canadian Musicians Moving To The U.S.

2009-12-19T15:47:00.000-08:00

ORIGINALLY POSTED ON THE FOURTH EDITION OF "THE BEAU ZONE" ON THE HARD ROCK HEROES WEBSITE FROM DECEMBER 2004 TO APRIL 2005.

Rob Williams did a writeup in The Winnipeg Sun recently on famous Winnipeg drummer Brent Fitz, who played with ex-Kiss member Bruce Kulick in Union (meeting Bruce through Lenita Erickson) and has since gone on to play with everyone from Vince Neil of Motley Crue to ex-Ratt lead singer Stephen Pearcy. That writeup inspired me to send Rob an e-mail and to post a version of that e-mail here on something I've always wondered about - just how do unknown Canadian musicians like Brent manage to cross the border legally (or illegally) to join rock bands in the United States?

In Rob's article on Brent, he interviews him and quotes him as saying, ".....so I did the old illegal alien thing....."

That sounds intriguing. Canadian musicians like Brent, who at the time he first crossed the border, are not stars with H1 visas, but are basically just working Canadian musicians. How do they avoid crossing the border illegally as a visitor to play gigs or live in the U.S. without being deported permanently?

I read somewhere Neil Young went through the same situation. When he left Thunder Bay to go to California where he eventually hooked up with Buffalo Springfield, he told Customs at the border he was a visitor.

Obviously the ruse caught up with him at some point, and I can't find any mention of how he got out of it in any of his biographies. (That's just me skimming in the store, in case it's there and it's just me missing it.) His situation at the time he crossed the border would be roughly comparable to the point in Brent Fitz's career when he did it, i.e. no one knew who either of these guys were at their respective times. Remember, Neil Young was not anywhere near a star when he crossed the border, just a working Canadian musician.

So how do Canadian musicians, if they choose not to do things legally from the get go in this regard and just cross the border as a visitor illegally to work as a musician in the U.S., get out of it? Obviously lawyers are involved, but laws are laws, and they have been broken. Have Neil Young, Brent Fitz, or any other names we can think of paid hefty prices for what they've done? How do they get to the point where they can cross the border as a working musician legally without any hassles, as I assume Neil Young does today?

That was my story idea for Rob to tackle for The Winnipeg Sun. Maybe he could even do a MARIA seminar on it. But nothing yet. Hopefully in the future.....

Pro Wrestling Comments

2009-12-12T15:16:00.000-08:00

ORIGINALLY POSTED ON THE THIRD EDITION OF "THE BEAU ZONE" ON THE HARD ROCK HEROES WEBSITE FROM SEPTEMBER TO DECEMBER 2004.

Here's something I keep forgetting about: WWE did a Chris Jericho home video awhile back called "Chris Jericho: Break Down The Walls." In it is a brief clip of a Club Taboo match here in Winnipeg in 1990 or 1991 which was one of Chris' first pro matches. In the video he talked about wrestling at this bar, but he mistakenly identified the bar as "Georgie's." Why? Surely Chris hasn't forgotten the name "Club Taboo," even though today that bar is called Mardi Gras. We do have a bar called Georgie's in Winnipeg (or by now that place has changed names, too), and since that time Georgie's has held wrestling events, most notably Joe & Cyrus' No Hold Barred wrestling cards, but they didn't have wrestling back in the early 90s. Or if Chris did wrestle at Georgie's back then and I didn't know about it, well, on the video first we see him talking about how he was going to wrestle somewhere in Winnipeg but not knowing quite where yet, then talking about how he drove past the marquee at "Georgie's" that said "wrestling" and how he thought at the time that wrestling in a bar was cheesy and how he didn't realize that's the very card he was on. Then we go to a Club Taboo match from promotor Tony Condello's TV show he had on CKY at the time, which would indicate that when he mentions Georgie's, that that is what we should then be seeing - Chris at Georgie's, which is not correct. Plus I always thought that the Club Taboo matches were definitely the first time Chris wrestled professionally in Winnipeg. So does anyone know the deal on that flub? I tried e-mailing Chris through his website as well as slapping a version of this on his message board, but no response. Anyone know?

No one ever points out Kane's beginnings when they write or talk about him, as to why they kept him in the mask, why keep his gimmick, etc. (This was when he was still in the mask.) When WWF/E made the decision to go to "Attitude," they had just created Kane and his storyline with the Undertaker. To pull the plug on that would have been disastrous, since that was a major angle. WWF/E saw what changing things like that does without telling the fans a word about it before (Shawn Michaels and his "knights," anyone?). So someone said, "Okay, this angle will be our last vestibule from our former 'cartoon wrestling' stance. We'll keep this one running, and this will be that style's only hangover nto the current product." That's why Kane existed all these years in the first place. Too bad WWE couldn't come up with a reason why Kane didn't need a voice box any more. I'll be looking for how they write about that in any Kane career synopsis I read in the future. Hopefully Kane's "marriage" to Lita doesn't overshadow that little detail in the writeups.

I was disappointed both WWE and Dave Meltzer's Wrestling Observer Newsletter said piss-all about Miss Elizabeth's tenure in WCW in her death coverage. Liz became a heel in WCW, and showed us a "good girl gone bad" routine I thoroughly enjoyed. Her peak was when she was in the NWO, paired up with Savage again, but this time both as heels, making them the Bonnie and Clyde of the NWO. Who can forget Liz spray painting "NWO" on Kimberly's back, placing her foot on a prone Disco Inferno while Savage counted the 1-2-3, or slamming a steel chair over Sting's head? Plus her leather outfits. I was in ecstasy at that - Liz as a bad girl - YEAH!!! All she was missing was the four-letter words and the cigarettes. Her crowning moment was in that Savage/DDP match at Halloween Havoc (forgot what year) when she smashed a "glass" candy tray over referee Mickey Jay's head and then strangled a prone DDP with the television cord before Kimberly ran out and grabbed Liz and ran her to the back. And in the description of that match, Meltzer LEFT THAT OUT!!!!! I never got around to writing him about that one. That's the Observer's figgest faux-pas. Then later on when the roles were sort of reversed and Kimberly was a heel and Liz was kidnapped and Kimberly was making Liz her slave, the stuff between the two of them was FUCKING HILARIOUS!!!!! Well, mainly because of Kim, but she was just hilarious as the hot babe that's full of herself. I miss that character so much and it's too bad Kim didn't come back as a heel with DDP when DDP went to WWE. Kim could still come back now as Bischoff's assistant. She was also hilarious in that role in WCW when Bischoff (in the gray hair) and Russo would talk about their matters and Kim would interrupt to talk about her career or her nails or whatever. HILARIOUS!!!

Portage And Main

2009-12-12T15:13:00.000-08:00

ORIGINALLY POSTED ON THE THIRD EDITION OF "THE BEAU ZONE" ON THE HARD ROCK HEROES WEBSITE FROM SEPTEMBER TO DECEMBER 2004.

Agencies have been looking for ideas on what to do with the corner of Portage & Main recently. I wrote in, and here's what I suggested:

Perhaps one component of the corner could be provided by Global, now that they own the TD Centre.

Muchmusic has been doing live TV in their ground floor "environment", or outside it, with people on the street being part of the scenery, for 20 years now. NBC and ABC have copied this approach, unbeknownst to Americans without Much, for their morning shows Today and Good Morning America, respectively, making them more vibrant and exciting shows. ABC even gave Good Morning America their own studio in Times Square for this purpose.

Maybe Global can do the same thing: Move their suppertime news broadcast from St. Vital to a new studio at the ground floor of the TD Centre in front of the windows and the street, where we would see all the passers-by. It would make for fun TV, and would open up new possibilities for Global to add more local broadcasts to the day shot from this location, like perhaps a competing show to A-Channel's The Big Breakfast, or even a late night weekend entertainment and music video show. Perhaps, as the former host of VPW's Hard Rock Heroes, Global would let me host it, too. We could get a steady stream of people from the nearby nightclubs late at night for audience interaction.

All of this would definitely add people traffic to Portage & Main, along with excitement over being in the background on TV. People could set their VCR's and watch themselves later.

Television

2009-12-12T15:10:00.000-08:00

ORIGINALLY POSTED ON THE THIRD EDITION OF "THE BEAU ZONE" ON THE HARD ROCK HEROES WEBSITE FROM SEPTEMBER TO DECEMBER 2004.

I hope in the new and final season of That '70s Show we'll finally get to see the gang, horror of horrors, ENTER 1980!!! You see, they have been in a time warp since Christmas. Let me explain: They did the talking yearbook photos gag at the end of the 2001/02 season with the heading "1978," they graduated high school at the end of the 2002/03 season, so that was 1979, and at the end of 2003 (part of the 2003/04 season) they did the Christmas show. So they must be stuck somewhere between Christmas and New Year's of 1979. 1980 is RIGHT AROUND THE CORNER!!!!! They do seem to be playing songs from 1979, and the license plate reads 1979 now, too. I was hoping they would graduate high school in 1980, 'cause that's the year I graduated, but at least Jackie will! Did you see the episode this past season where they accompany her to a high school dance? I had forgotten that she's actually a grade behind the rest of the gang. I remember someone brought it up in the first season. As she's preparing to graduate, someone's gotta burst in shouting, "OH MY GOD!!! PETER CRISS HAS LEFT KISS!!!" I remember that news coming out in May 1980. Americans finish school in May, right? In Canada we finish in June. I would also like to see one of those dream sequences with the four guys doing a parody of Cheap Trick's "Dream Police" video, wearing those Dream Police outfits Cheap Trick also wears on the cover of the DP album. Wouldn't that be nifty?

Rock And Roll

2009-12-12T15:08:00.000-08:00

ORIGINALLY POSTED ON THE THIRD EDITION OF "THE BEAU ZONE" ON THE HARD ROCK HEROES WEBSITE FROM SEPTEMBER TO DECEMBER 2004.

How about some Alex Lifeson jokes? (You do recall Alex Lifeson from Rush was helping his son beat up cops at a club on New Year's Eve, don't you?) He's old enough to know what's right, but young enough not to choose it. He's wise enough to win the world, but fool enough to lose it. (Get it?) Hey, good thing Rush has those washing machines on stage now - maybe they can use them to wash Alex Lifeson's shirt! HA HA HA HA HA!!!

Kiss

2009-12-12T15:03:00.000-08:00

ORIGINALLY POSTED ON THE THIRD EDITION OF "THE BEAU ZONE" ON THE HARD ROCK HEROES WEBSITE FROM SEPTEMBER TO DECEMBER 2004.

Since Kiss is my favorite band, people ask me what my opinions are these days of the band "changing their minds" and carrying on with touring after the farewell tour and without Ace or Peter, but with "imposters" Tommy Thayer and Eric Singer wearing Ace and Peter's makeup. Here's the reason this is happening: This fits in with Gene's natural inclination for entrepreneurship and its' resulting extension towards today's phenomenon known as "branding." (Personally, I think branding is nothing new, it's just a fancy new name for the same old thing.) Kiss is no longer a band, Kiss is now a brand. Gene Simmons understands the concept of branding now, and he recognizes that Kiss had painted themselves into a corner with the reunion and now that they've done the farewell tour, and also with the various Peter and Ace contract problems, probably won't release any more albums of original music and will definitely have temporary or permanent replacement "members" in the original members' makeup and costumes. On the subject of the current tour, Paul said, "Consider this the first in a series of encores." I don't think one-off appearances should be counted, especially TV shows where they're only doing one or two songs. Plus I think Paul & Gene recognize original music from Kiss in makeup and costumes has run its' course. Psycho Circus was a deliberate attempt to construct "A Kiss Album." But they can't do that twice, and they know it. After their 70's albums, what's left? Changes in direction have proven to not work for the makeup version of this band. Personally, I would like to have seen Kiss call the farewell tour the "farewell to the makeup and costumes" tour, and then continue with the orignal lineup but wear whatever they want on stage and play whatever kind of music they wanted to on original albums. If Peter or Ace can't be there, whatever. The albums may remind us of The Beatles' White Album, but whatever. It would honestly be where these men's minds and hearts lie in 2004. But Gene would probably say, "But that's not Kiss." So Kiss becomes a brand; those four makeup designs, those particular songs, that particular show, and it's all reflected on the merchandise Gene puts out. As Gene says, one day there will be no original members in the band and it will really be like a carnival attraction. That would be so many years away, though, it's hard to connect that in the mind with the tribute bands. I can see the carnival attraction attracting, say, the teenagers and 20-somethings of 2043. But the tribute bands today play bars to dwindling audiences. They've burned themselves out. Gene would simply have to order them to cease and desist before Kiss (the corporation called Kiss) does their own "tribute band," that's all. The evolution of all that would certainly be interesting to those of us who live that long, that's for sure.

Pro Wrestling Comments

2009-12-12T13:34:00.000-08:00

ORIGINALLY POSTED ON THE SECOND EDITION OF "THE BEAU ZONE" ON THE HARD ROCK HEROES WEBSITE FROM JUNE TO SEPTEMBER 2004.

Speaking of The Apprentice, as I was above, here's my idea for a new reality show: It's kind of like The Apprentice, only instead of Donald Trump, you have The Million Dollar Man Ted Dibiase, and he makes the teams do all the Fear Factor stuff. When someone asks what these things have to do with running a business, he tells them to shut up and has Virgil beat them up and belittle them. At the end, everyone goes to the board room. The door opens and Ted walks in. Already sitting on his side of the table is Virgil on one side of him and IRS on the other side. Ted then proceeds to fire everyone. It'll be tremendous.

Before Trish Stratus turned heel, I had this idea for how she should turn: Picture a tag team match: Chris Jericho and Trish Stratus vs. Christian and a mystery female partner, who will turn out to be.....Chris' wife Jessica!!! Trish will scream, "You have a WIFE?" and the three of them will triple team Chris. Chris should now be the heel and the other three the faces, but in WWE logic, since you can't have three faces ganging up on someone, the announcers will feel sorry for Jericho, saying he doesn't deserve this kind of triple-team treatment, and will sway Chris into being the face and the other three the heels. Trish will start swearing and smoking in addition to wearing more stilettos to reflect her new heel character. It'll all also be tremendous.

Speaking of Chris Jericho, how about that week on Raw where he comes out and talks about how excited the crowd is to see Canada's greatest athlete - you mean Angelo Mosca was there? And don't say Gene Kiniski - Mosca's the one who won that feud with Kiniski in 1977 at the Winnipeg Arena to determine who Canada's greatest athlete is.

Before this gets too old, as if it isn't already, remember the NHB card Joe and Cyrus put on at The Colesseum (now Cowboys)? If you were there, you'll remember the ring entrance music was awful. I hope they get that fixed for next time. What does Cyrus' entrance have to do with Iron Maiden's "Run To The Hills?" Usually it's the TNN ECW theme that's played for him. And the DJ didn't have that Deep Purple song (forgot the name of it, but I believe it's from the Perfect Strangers album) for Shane Douglas' entrance, either. By the way, playing that song was a nice touch at the previous show at Coyote's when Shane was there, as Joe & Cyrus apparently figured out Shane's WCW music sounded exactly like that song. Maybe if they get DDP here they can play Nirvana's "Smells Like Teen Spirit" for his music.

Someone should start a new indie wrestling league called MFW - Middle Finger Wrestling. Nice ring to it, eh?

Hey, how about a battle royal where the winner gets to be called "The Coach?" The participants will be John Tolos, Johnathan Coachman, Scott Taylor, and Jeff Allan (whatever happened to him?). I always thought it was funny, but frustrating, that here are two guys opposite each other on the radio calling themselves "The Coach" and no one ever commented on air how funny (as in funny/weird) that was. Of course, the competition doesn't exist, so neither CITI FM (Taylor) nor whatever 97 called themselves at the time (Allan) would acknowledge it. But no one in the Winnipeg press made those comments, either. It could be because of rock radio's low reputation, but that's another story for another day.

Radio Ranting

2009-12-12T13:30:00.000-08:00

ORIGINALLY POSTED ON THE SECOND EDITION OF "THE BEAU ZONE" ON THE HARD ROCK HEROES WEBSITE FROM JUNE TO SEPTEMBER 2004.

Talk about self-serving and arrogant!

Twice in a day on Power 97 on the weekend of the Grand Rock festival, announcers tell us that "The Studio 97 with I Mother Earth is postponed because of a death in the family." Okay.....so, uh, what about I Mother Earth's actual performance at Grand Rock? Is THAT still on? I mean, that IS what I Mother Earth is coming to town to do, right? All media stuff is just on the side, while they're in town, right?

I finally read that yes, their Grand Rock performance is cancelled, in the Free Press. So why can't Power 97 tell us that? Is their stupid little Studio 97 piece that important that anything having nothing directly to do with Power 97, like I Mother Earth's actual performance at Grand Rock, doesn't exist? I don't care if that's what the announcers were given to read, if it was me I would add in that their performance is cancelled, too. Actually, I would tell the fans the performance is cancelled, and, oh yeah, by the way, that means our little Studio 97 is cancelled, too.

Perhaps was it someone else other than Power 97 presenting the show? (I didn't check.) That asinine situation used to happen - if you have two radio stations playing Helix and Helix comes to town, if one of the stations is presenting it, the other station pretends it doesn't exist. Oh, but they'll still play Helix's music. If an announcer is cornered on the air about it by a caller, or an on-air guest, he'll just casually say, "Yeah, I hear they're coming to town." BULLSHIT!!!

Rock radio should exist as a be-all-end-all Winnipeg clearing house for rock and roll and all rock bands in Winnipeg and in rock magazines and on Muchmusic and MTV FOR THE FANS. News, bands, gigs, interactive stuff - TELL US ALL. KEEP US IN THE LOOP AND PART OF THE MACHINE. After all, it's the fans who listen to the commercials and pay the bills, right? So why WOULD a radio station treat them like shit like that?

Someone in Winnipeg print media needs to write about this crap. And I don't mean me, because newspapers reach a wider audience than this does. (This may reach appropriate individuals outside of Winnipeg.) Someone needs to expose some hidden attitudes among stations like Power 97 here. Why does this uppity exist? Why can't rock radio stations strive to constantly do whatever it takes to please the fans? Actually, Power 97 playing those Winnipeg bands is a positive step - now, if they could just play some exciting stuff, like The Unband, The Donnas, Nashville Pussy, and Maximum R & R, and forget all the boring warmed-over grunge bands Chad Kroeger discovers. But I guess they need their CanCon. But I digress.

Winnipeg Nightclub & Nightlife Stuff

2009-12-12T13:28:00.000-08:00

ORIGINALLY POSTED ON THE SECOND EDITION OF "THE BEAU ZONE" ON THE HARD ROCK HEROES WEBSITE FROM JUNE TO SEPTEMBER 2004.

Hey, no wonder those students picked the weekend of April 2nd and 3rd to do the boycott of all the Canad Inn nightclubs - that was the weekend of the time change! We set our clocks one hour ahead that weekend - one hour less partying to do on the Saturday. Those students were smart.

Television

2009-12-12T13:20:00.000-08:00

ORIGINALLY POSTED ON THE SECOND EDITION OF "THE BEAU ZONE" ON THE HARD ROCK HEROES WEBSITE FROM JUNE TO SEPTEMBER 2004.

Let's see if we can start a new catch phrase here. You know how Bill won The Apprentice so now he's going to be the guy in charge of building Donald Trump's new Chicago 90-story tower? Well, let's see if we here at The Beau Zone can give that building an unofficial name. How about.....The BILL-ding! Get it? Bill? Building? BILL-ding? Has a nice ring to it, huh? (Especially with the "ding" in BILL-ding!!)

This was my prediction for the last episode of Friends: Rachel will fly to Paris. Afterward, Ross decides to make one more last-ditch attempt to get her back. He flies to Paris and rents a car. He's sitting in the car in front of her new home. She comes out. But she doesn't see Ross. She looks at the car parked in front of Ross and gives a wide smile to the driver. It's Mr. Big! Rachel
gets in the car and drives off with Mr. Big to Ross' utter dismay. Later, Rachel breaks up with Big when she finds out he's two-timing her with Carrie Bradshaw. Really? Abso-fucking-lutely!!

Rock And Roll

2009-12-12T13:16:00.000-08:00

ORIGINALLY POSTED ON THE SECOND EDITION OF "THE BEAU ZONE" ON THE HARD ROCK HEROES WEBSITE FROM JUNE TO SEPTEMBER 2004.

In regard to Sam Roberts' "Brother Down," how come nobody points out that the portion of the song in the chorus where Sam sings, ".....I think my life is passing me by....." sounds reminiscent of The Beatles? With all the album reviews out there in Canadian media about this album and Sam himself, you'd think SOMEONE would say that. But no. So I'll say it!

Paying Your Bill At Restaurants

2009-12-12T13:09:00.001-08:00

ORIGINALLY POSTED ON THE SECOND EDITION OF "THE BEAU ZONE" ON THE HARD ROCK HEROES WEBSITE FROM JUNE TO SEPTEMBER 2004.

Why is it like pulling teeth trying to pay your bill at most restaurants?

Once your meal is served, the server comes back right away to ask how your meal is, and that's the last you ever see of them.

Once you're close to finishing eating, they're never around to ask them for the check. You have to walk around the restaurant to find them, or ask one of the other servers.

Then as you've finished your meal and are waiting for the check, you finally get it. But you have to pay the server, too. And you better have it understood clearly by the server in advance that you're going to pay right then and there once you receive the check, or the server will just quickly take off and leave you waiting AGAIN to pay him or her.

One time at the old Grapes Pembina location, I had already made it clear to the server that I could pay my bill right when he gave me the bill, but sure enough, he gives me the bill and starts to walk away. I'm calling after him, "Stop! Don't run away! I can pay right now!" But he just looked at me with a scared look on his face as he ran away from me.

For God's sake, if these people are too busy serving other customers to take my payment, then why don't all restaurants install a cashier like Perkins does, so I only have to wait for my bill, and once I get my bill, the waiting is done and I can simply take my bill up to the cashier to pay it?

Or maybe if these people don't want my money, maybe I'll just start leaving the restaurant without paying anybody. It sure seems like they'll never notice.

Your thoughts?

Pro Wrestling Comments

2009-12-07T01:02:00.000-08:00

ORIGINALLY POSTED ON THE FIRST EDITION OF "THE BEAU ZONE" ON THE HARD ROCK HEROES WEBSITE FROM APRIL TO JUNE 2004.

If Hulk Hogan didn't walk away from WWE, I'd say Vince should have proved Hogan and Mr. America were the same person by signing a match between the two at the next PPV. Of couse, that would be too easy, and how does WWE get out of that one? I'll tell you how - by putting Dave "The Equalizer" Sullivan in the Mr. America costume. Hogan unmasks him, and they celebrate in the ring together to Dave's WCW "I want to be a Hulkamaniac" music. WWE could also have Vince call Hogan on his cell phone while Mr. America is in the ring in a match, but there's too many things wrong with that scenerio, both in reality and in storyline, that you can just guess.

If I were a WWE superstar and I were asked to intro a "From The Vault" match on WWE Confidential, I'd pick a WCW match that originally aired opposite a Wrestlemania on a Clash Of the Champions, and I'd identify it as such, especially if it got higher viewership than the Wrestlemania (I have a feeling that happened, which is why I say that). How well do you think that would go over with the office? Too bad Confidential isn't live.

Remember the 2003 Backlash PPV? A big reason Goldberg got no heat at Backlash is because WWE changed his music that night. I still believe to this day WWE should never have changed his music at all. Sometimes changing music works, and other times it's so disastrous they just have to go back to the old music, as in the cases of Steve Austin and Kurt Angle. There is really no good time to change a wrestler's music, unless you tell the fans you're doing it first. Fans feel helpless when they hear new music, because it smacks of the product not belonging to the fans, that it belongs to the office, and to management personnel backstage, where the fans cannot go because the security guards won't let them. Wrestling fans like to believe this is "their" product and "their" world. Actually, WWE could make a decent effort at telling fans now in the computer age. On their website, or in their e-mail newsletter, if they have one, they could say something like, "Watch for new Goldberg music in coming weeks....." Then fans would at least expect it. Don't know if that would still result in less heat or not.

So let me get this straight - Eric Bischoff says he can't wrestle Shane McMahon because Linda McMahon's rule that both he and Austin can't lay a hand on a WWE superstar unless physically provoked means Bischoff and Austin can't wrestle in an actual match as well. Austin asks Shane in the ring if he's a contracted WWE superstar. Shane says no. So the match is on. Then next week Bischoff is forced into a match against Kane. Huh? I thought Kane IS a contracted WWE superstar?!?! Huh? What?

Mad Cow Disease

2009-12-07T01:00:00.000-08:00

ORIGINALLY POSTED ON THE FIRST EDITION OF "THE BEAU ZONE" ON THE HARD ROCK HEROES WEBSITE FROM APRIL TO JUNE 2004.

In the paper it said regarding that mad cow found in the United States, "DNA tests are being performed in Nebraska and Saskatchewan to determine whether the U.S. cow was actually born in Canada." Apparently Gordon Pinsent and Pierre Berton are requesting those same tests be performed on Pamela Anderson to determine if she's really Canadian.

Terra Footwear

2009-12-07T00:59:00.000-08:00

ORIGINALLY POSTED ON THE FIRST EDITION OF "THE BEAU ZONE" ON THE HARD ROCK HEROES WEBSITE FROM APRIL TO JUNE 2004.

Regarding the Terra Footwear billboards with the hot babes on them that those lousy protesters got taken down: Gee, I wonder what they think of the Tool Time girl on Home Improvement. Maybe they'll get those reruns banned, too. Heaven forbid if there was ever an actual TV show called Tool Time that utilized such a girl. Hey, maybe Terra Footwear should open their own stores and get their salespeople to be hot sexy babes that look and dress like that. It works for bars and bartenders. Nowadays, if you see a girl dressed like a slut, you don't say, "You look like a hooker," you say, "You look like a bartender." Hookers wear jeans now. Maybe Terra Footwear can take a cue from the bars. But the protests would probably continue, because the people doing the protesting over "hiring practices" or "employment conditions" would never become aware of the hot babe bartenders because the protesters are in bed fast asleep by the time bar culture takes over in the wee hours. Hooters has gotten just some protests, but that's logical, as that kind of business falls somewhere down the middle.

Winnipeg Nightclub & Nightlife Stuff

2009-12-07T00:49:00.000-08:00

ORIGINALLY POSTED ON THE FIRST EDITION OF "THE BEAU ZONE" ON THE HARD ROCK HEROES WEBSITE FROM APRIL TO JUNE 2004.

I didn't go to see the oldies acts at Oktoberfest in 2003, although I would have liked to. What time do they come on? I called the office to ask and they refused to tell me. I left my name and number for a manager to call me and he never called. Look, if they can't be bothered to tell me what time the acts go on, I guess I can't be bothered to show up. I really have no idea. If it's The Zoo or the Royal Albert, they close at 2:00 a.m., so I know what time the last band will go on. You just backtrack everything from 2:00 a.m. Plus bands at The Zoo generally go right up to 2:00 a.m. as well, and maybe a few minutes past. At the Arena, the first band is at 7:30 p.m. and that's on your ticket and in the advertising. You can predict when the headlining band comes on. But what about Oktoberfest? How do you know what time the bands come on? And what time does it close? 2:00 a.m.? 1:00 a.m.? The office couldn't tell me that, either. What if I go to see Paul Revere and the Raiders and they're doing their last song as I'm showing up? Bullshit. So I didn't go. Clean up your act for 2004, Oktoberfest.

Television

2009-12-07T00:47:00.000-08:00

ORIGINALLY POSTED ON THE FIRST EDITION OF "THE BEAU ZONE" ON THE HARD ROCK HEROES WEBSITE FROM APRIL TO JUNE 2004.

An open letter to Muchmusic VJ Amanda Walsh: Amanda, I almost died when I saw your dress and those shoes you were wearing at the MMVAs in 2003. Those kind of stilettos that lace up the girls' legs just drive me wild when I see them in magazines, but I never thought I'd see YOU wearing them. NEVER, EVER take those shoes off, especially when you have sex with the man of your dreams. You should put those shoes on, get your hair done up all sexy, get your makeup done all sexy with red lipstick, take off your clothes, light up a smoke and stand in front of a full-length mirror and admire yourself. Ever do that? Maybe fantasize about doing porn while you're looking at yourself? Just a thought.

Instead of CTV here in Canada not bleeping out the swearing during The Osbournes, how about doing that for Punk'd? I'd much rather hear Jessica Alba or Mandy Moore uttering "fuck" and "shit" on TV than The Osbournes. It would be more exciting, too, if you get my drift, heh, heh, heh. Maybe Mandy Moore saying "fuck" on TV will help her to sell more records, too. As Gene Simmons says, "Good girls may go to heaven, but bad girls go anywhere they want."

Rock And Roll

2009-12-07T00:45:00.000-08:00

ORIGINALLY POSTED ON THE FIRST EDITION OF "THE BEAU ZONE" ON THE HARD ROCK HEROES WEBSITE FROM APRIL TO JUNE 2004.

Did you know Bif Naked and Matthew Good live in the same apartment building in Vancouver? She's on the 15th floor, he's on the 6th floor. IT'S TRUE!!! Said by Bif herself on "The Buzz" on 92 CITI FM in Winnipeg June 27, 2003 at 6:30 p.m.

The New Arena, The MTS Centre

2009-12-07T00:39:00.000-08:00

ORIGINALLY POSTED ON THE FIRST EDITION OF "THE BEAU ZONE" ON THE HARD ROCK HEROES WEBSITE FROM APRIL TO JUNE 2004.

The new arena in Winnipeg, the MTS Centre, will be opening up this fall. Let's talk about parking and other issues surrounding it, shall we?

My main concern regarding parking would be in the winter, I guess, when it's -30 out and you park your car outdoors somewhere and you go from the arena event to a nearby bar or lounge and stay there until 2:00 a.m. Then you've left your car outside unplugged for 6 hours, which means you may need a boost. (Well, my car won't, but cars I used to own would.) At least with Winnipeg Arena, you're definitely starting your car after the event is over.

Plus if you do that, you have to be aware of when you can and can't retreive your car from indoor parking garages (year-round). If they're closed by the time you leave the nightclub you're at in the wee hours, then you're out of luck until next morning. That means those garages are off limits to you and your plans. You'll have to do your legwork ahead of time to learn which places aren't an option for you to park in.

Personally, I'm in Osborne Village, so it may be easy for me to take a quick bus home and get in my car there (i.e. free parking) and head off to a club afterward. Or just walk, if a great rock show is at The Zoo. So I'm a bit prejudiced.

I think the Eaton's site is a great site for a new arena - it's right across the street from Winnipeg's rock corner, consisting of O Calcutta and Wild Planet (rock t-shirts) and A & B Sound (the CD's themselves). Maybe those places will stay open late after the MTS Centre concerts so you can buy the band's t-shirts there at reduced prices instead of paying the inflated arena t-shirt prices.

As far as downtown revitalization goes, we do need people living downtown - how about tearing down most buildings bounded by Portage, Garry, Graham, and Smith, plus the empty buildings on the north side of Portage just north of that block (where Records on Wheels and the first Musiplex used to be) and putting up highrises and condos there? It's mostly old junk in that block. And get rid of the St. Regis Hotel and the derilicts that hang out there, too.

That's a perfect block for people to live in - everything's within walking distance. Shopping to the left (Portage Place), the arena to the left, and nightclubs and the Exchange District to the north (and the walk isn't long). Plus financial stuff to the right at Portage & Main. Why doesn't anyone think of that?