Me during the broadcast of "Much On Demand" outside in front of the Muchmusic building in Toronto, ON on September 25, 2003.

Saturday, December 29, 2012

Let's Do The Samoan Time Warp: My Idea For Back To The Future, Part 4

Robert Zemeckis, where are you?

I have an idea for Back to the Future Part 4!

In Part 4, Marty McFly has grown up, has unfortunately acquired Parkinson's disease (not funny, not supposed to be, like the Family Guy parodies, but necessary), and has a teen-aged son. Marty and his son visit Doc Brown, and the Doc tells them he has added a new feature to the DeLorean time machine that allows them to land somewhere else in time in any other spot in the world, not just the spot they left from.

Okay, now read this condensed news item that was in the press after New Year's last year, at the start of 2012:

"A hop across the international date line transported the South Pacific island nation of Samoa 24 hours into the future - making it the first in the world to ring in the new year. Samoans began celebrating.....at the stroke of midnight on Thursday, Dec. 29, when the country skipped over Friday and moved straight into 12:01 a.m. on Dec. 31. Samoa and neighbouring Tokelau lie near the date line that zigzags vertically through the Pacific Ocean, and both sets of islands decided to realign themselves this year from the Americas side of the line to the Asia side, to be more in tune with key trading partners."

So back to our story: Marty's son thinks the time machine is really neat, but, with Marty and the Doc in the car, accidentally sets it to travel back in time to Samoa on.....you guessed it - December 30, 2011!!!!! A DAY THAT DOESN'T EXIST! Great Scott!!

What happens then? Do the three of them get sucked into some kind of epic vortex? Well, that's for Zemeckis and the writers to find out, I guess. But Robert, baby, if you're reading this, e-mail me at beauh@mts.net and I'll tell you where to send my cheque for coming up with the idea for the film. And if a film gets made like that and no one from the film sees this, well, you guys know who got the idea first, so.....LAWYER TIME!!! Well, once we determine if Zemeckis and his crew didn't come up with the idea themselves in the last year. It's taken me a year to get to this. If they didn't, then film or no film: bring on the cash. Then, once I have the cash, bring on the girls. It's party time. Evander Kane, eat your heart out. If no film gets made? Then at least all of you have gotten a lot of fun and enjoyment from reading this!