Pro Wrestling Comments

ORIGINALLY POSTED ON THE NINTH EDITION OF "THE BEAU ZONE" ON THE HARD ROCK HEROES WEBSITE FROM NOVEMBER 2006 TO JUNE 2007.

Too bad Kevin Nash is under contract with TNA. If it wasn't for that, WWE could do DX vs. the NWO! Shawn and HHH vs. Hall and Nash! And Hall and Nash could have Eric Bischoff as their manager! It's never been done before! Vince could sic the NWO on DX! And the end of the match would have some kind of non-finish where the NWO turns and all four guys plus Bischoff celebrate in the ring! (MSG revisited!) Then Vince'll come out all pissed off and make a match, 5 on 5, with DX, the NWO, and Bischoff, vs. the Spirit Squad. Hey, it fits! Then Bischoff could drop out, saying he's not a wrestler, and replace himself with Sean Waltman, who of course was in BOTH the NWO and DX! Now, there's a match!

On the April 1 edition of TNA, I like it when James Mitchell says, "Christian, wherever you're hiding this week....." He was hiding here in Winnipeg at the World Of Wheels car show! I wonder if James Mitchell knew that. Maybe he and Abyss could have terrorized him here, too, after beating him up at his home. They sure would have had a lot of cars to choose from, to smash him onto. Hey, maybe Mitchell could have gotten Honky Tonk Man to join in! I should have gone. I should have asked Christian, "Aren't you feeling nervous signing autographs here when James Mitchell was terrorizing your wife at your home last week? Where's she today? Could he be doing it again?" What would Christian have said, knowing that that night on TNA Impact Mitchell would play the tape of him and Abyss beating him up in his own home? I could have shown Christian the Chris Jericho clipping, too, showing him how Jericho was running to be the next Manitoba Conservative leader, before the Winnipeg Sun revealed that to be a hoax the next day. I never thought about Christian when I saw that. For the record, I was fooled for about 30 seconds until I got back into my car after buying the Sun. "Wait a sec!" I thought, after realizing what day it was. I was wondering if it was that or the Craig Ferguson story (him maybe doing the Late Late Show here in Winnipeg for a week) that was a hoax. The third front-page story about Winnipeg gas stations charging for air I thought was probably true, as I paid 50 cents for air in Grand Forks, ND last fall. Hey, who needs Wrestlemania weekend when we've got our own stuff going on here in Winnipeg, the city the whole world revolves around?

I read in the gossip mags Stacy Keibler is now acting as a matchmaker for Nick Lachey, who obviously she met through his brother Drew on Dancing With The Stars. Maybe she'll hook him up with a WWE Diva. Well, not Mickie James, of course, she doesn't swing that way. Nick needs to ask himself if Mickie James will interfere in this in any way! He doesn't want whoever Stacy fixes him up with fooling around with Mickie James! (Hey, see the Pussycat Dolls comment above!)

Every time I hear the commentators say "Angle slam" during a Kurt Angle match, it makes me want to eat a breakfast dish called an Angle Slam at Perkins.

Shelton Benjamin's mama should seek out Simon Dean and try out his patented Simon system, don't you think?

So all I have left now is just some jokes on if Chris Jericho did become premier of Manitoba: 1) Instead of a press conference, he could have the Highlight Reel. 2) He could get new generations interested in politics - he could "bring the walls down!" 3) He could have been the Ayatollah of Manitoba!